I used to think helping people was a good thing. But as I have said before, generalising is not good. I realised how helping can hinder once you get into the details.
“The road to hell is paved with good intentions.”
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Help in the short term may involve giving some money, food, clothing or shelter. But this is not a good longer term set up. It is a good intention, but we know where those can lead. The person can become dependent on you. You certainly don’t need another dependent. And it is not good for their self image, confidence or pride to be dependent on someone or something else.
Immediate help per above is fine for an emergency. However, it is best for both of you to help the person to become independent again as swiftly as possible. In the longer term, people do better and are happier if they can provide for themselves.
In addition, you do not want to become the person that needs to pay for some or everything over a period of months or years. This is true even if you can afford it.
It may require a little tough love to get people back on their feet. That is ok, as most people can handle it. They may not like it so much in the moment, but in the longer term they will be more grateful.
This is especially true if they realise how helping can hinder.
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