Having a fixed or growth mindset can dramatically impact the success you find in life. Because of this, replace smart with capable when speaking with children, or anyone else for that matter.
When children, and people in general, hear praise that they are smart, it can lead them to believe they have the answers already. And that if they don’t have the answers, that perhaps they are stupid. This can lead to the desire to only do things where they know the answer for sure. This in turn can lead to reducing their circle of knowledge and reducing their participation in class or conversation.
This is indicative of a fixed mindset. This is the idea that what we know, we know. People can believe that if they don’t know, then they are not intelligent rather than they need to go find the answer. Someone with a growth mindset will note their lack of knowledge and learn to grow their knowledge base.
This is all reviewed in Carol S. Dweck’s book Mindset and in her research.
This idea is why I choose to use the word capable with my kids. They do not know everything. Nor can they do everything. However, they are capable of learning, training, practicing and improving. This is how I suggest they tackle all things in life.
Replace smart with capable for better long term results.
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