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Category: Gratitude
CategoriesGratitude
Be Grateful For Your Abode
Spend a week in a tent. Especially if it is cold, wet or both. In no time at all, you’ll be grateful for your abode. You’ll be longing for home.
All the little things that niggle at you will seem superfluous. The loose door hinge, the sticky window, or that bit of painting that should be touched up. It will all seem ostentatious or unnecessary .
Maybe the first week in the tent will be untethered euphoria. Great!!! But give it two or three weeks and you’ll get that grateful feeling.
Be grateful for your abode.
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Keep It Courteous
It is fine to have a difference of opinion. It is one way for us to learn about things we weren’t aware of before. But keep it courteous.
If you find yourself getting agitated and speaking more rapidly, it is time to take a breather. Take a few deep breathes and try to regroup on the key topic again. Alternatively, you could try to get back on to a point that you both agreed on. Then you could build from there.
Refrain from handing out an insult, no matter how much you want to or they ‘deserve it.’ Insults weaken your position. People who don’t have a strong grasp of the facts or have a weak case, might try to sway the crowd with an unnecessary comment. Don’t fall to this.
Take some breaths. Regroup your thoughts. Concede an agreeable part of the point. But stay away from the emotional comment. It may play to your audience (see yesterday’s post), but even many of them will notice you ran out of solid material. You get a short term ‘win’ but don’t really look like a winner.
It may not feel as good as unloading on someone and making derisory comments, but you will be better for it.
Keep it courteous.
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Quality Time Defined
Is quality time what you want or what they want? If one of you isn’t delighted, is it still quality time? It’s time to have quality time defined.
Deciding you are going for a walk with a friend, who doesn’t enjoy walking, might not be the best idea of quality time. Do you both have to enjoy the activity, discussion or company? Or is it ok if just one of you do?
When you spend some of your day with your young child, is it enough to just enjoy being together? Or do you need to enjoy the event too? Is it quality time either way?
Encouraging your child to try something with you might seem like a good idea. You will be expanding their horizons and possibly adding a new, burgeoning skill to their repertoire. This is brilliant if they thoroughly enjoyed it. However, if they were not very interested or engaged, is it still quality time?
Is a shared memory considered quality time, even if it is not a brilliant or positive one? Perhaps they learned a lesson, or you did. If it came from a difficult experience, but something good came from it, does it fit the description?
In summary, life will be different for you with quality time defined.
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Look For Light Everyday
Try this. Every day for the next 7 days find the good in everything you can. Look for the light everyday. Sometimes it can be hard to see. This is especially true if you tend to find something wrong or things that could or should be better.
Appreciate whatever it is for just being there. Remember that the world is just people trying to do their thing as best they can in their moment. Sure everything could be perfect. We should all think perfectly and speak perfectly and have perfect manners. Of course though, perfect in just the vision you have in your mind.
Your idea of perfect might be the opposite to my idea of it. You might think people should get free strawberry ice cream every day. I might think perfect is free vanilla ice cream.
But if you can look for the good in people, places and events, you will train your mind to be happier or at least more appreciative. If we train our mind one way, it can be hard to train it another way. So it is better if you can train it just once. Try to have positive thoughts.
Look for light everyday. Let it become easier with practice.
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Enjoy The Summer Fun
Take a trip, relax with friends or enjoy the evenings. People have different ideas of what they want to do for the holiday period. Enjoy the summer fun though, regardless of your chosen activity.
What does your ideal summer look like? Do you like the heat? Is there a place you usually go? Does your time involve more family or more friends.
Some people like to be around many others. Although others like to get away from it all and be a little isolated.
I do like consistent warmth. Although I am not a big fan of air conditioning. A light breeze can be nice. I also enjoy a pool or the sea to jump into to cool down too.
Reading a book under a tree and contemplating what you are reading is nice. As is looking up at the sky and watching the clouds roll by. If you can see shapes and animals in them it is all the better.
Oh, and ice cream. You cannot forget some nice ice cream. I’m partial to Haagen Dazs, especially their vanilla, pralines or salted caramel flavours.
Whatever you like to do, go full on now during August. You may have only four to six weeks left before the autumn air is with us.
Enjoy the summer fun while you can!
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Pottery Decorated By Kids
It’s a nice idea for kids to decorate pottery. It’s a nice way to let them be creative and have a lasting memory of it. Pottery decorated by kids can be both lovely and useful.
We had a pottery place just around the corner from our house when the kids were very little. I hadn’t really noticed it before kids. And even with kids, I probably didn’t see much value in it. But then I went once with the kids to make a gift for their Mom’s birthday.
Although it was at times challenging to get the small children to decide on, focus and complete the items, it was worth it. They really enjoyed the process. In addition, they liked the idea of making something for Mom.
Even though we couldn’t get the finished product for some time, when it was ready, it was great. We ended up spending a fair amount of time and money in that shop over a few years. With that, we acquired quite a few pieces of designer pottery that we often used.
We often used pieces every day. However, through a combination of moving and being extra careful with these irreplaceable items, we stopped using them. That was until now.
Roxane got a big decorated plate out for dessert serving yesterday. It was great to see and use it. The kids even compared the size of their hands and feet on it too.
Pottery decorated by kids is a lovely, lasting gift to yourself.
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Gratitude Is Great
When was the last time you said you were grateful for something? Who did you say it to? Gratitude is great if you actually do it. Writing it down and speaking it out loud are two great ways to express it well.
My daughter’s bedtime routine includes reflecting on the day and discussing what we are grateful for. Usually this part is done between my wife and daughter. This time was one for me though.
She asked me what three things I was grateful for today. Being asked the question by someone else creates a different level of importance on the question. You don’t really have to think about the question if you are doing it on your own. Just thinking about the idea of gratitude is enough to get you going. But it is not the same.
It was better to have the discussion. And I couldn’t be lazy or cop out with just one or two. It made me really think about what aspects of the day made me most grateful. It was such a good experience, I might try to do that more often with her.
I do write in a gratitude journal most mornings, though it is a little different. With my daughter it is out loud rather than written. Also, reviewing the day in the evening before sleeping can certainly help with recall.
Gratitude is great.
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What Do You Believe?
When reading something, have you ever thought why you enjoy it or find it uncomfortable? What do you believe? Have you ever taken stock of what matters to you in life?
I remember a baseball movie from the 80’s where the lead character rhymed off what he believed in. I couldn’t remember all the details but I was impressed by his recount. It was impressive that he had actually thought about it and was quite clear about it. There was no pause, no slight hesitation or uncertainty.
Sometimes I have started to write out a list as well. It’s something I should continue. It seems like a reasonable thing to do, especially with the big topics in your life. Writing them out gives some glaring clarity too. You can’t simply play mind games with yourself. You can’t shift in a constant, ‘if this then that’, scenario.
Some people’s beliefs change depending on who is saying it. That is unfortunate but can happen. There are plenty of videos online which demonstrate this tendency.
Give it a try later today. Set aside 10 minutes and see how many core beliefs you can write into the notes section of your phone. Put them in there so you can review them occasionally. Reflect on them and adjust them as you consider them in the future.
What do you believe?
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