CategoriesActionObserveProperty

A Distracted 6 Year Old

Have you ever been distracted or lost your focus? Of course you have. People can easily go off track like a distracted 6 year old. A phone rings, a note reminds you of something, or you just walk into the kitchen and you forget what you were going to do.

This happens to everyone at some point in their life. I know this can happen to me severely times per day. Sometimes it is funny and I laugh at it. At other times, it is a little frustrating to forget something, maybe have to backtrack, or lose 15 minutes and you can’t remember how that happened.

People have good intentions to stay focused. Though there are so many things going on in our days, it can present a reasonable challenge. Remember this any time you hire someone or ask a person to get something done. Assume they are well intentioned but follow up with them. And do that more frequently than you think you should.

This is particularly true when buying a property. It is very easy for people to get distracted with other work or activities and unnecessarily shift things to tomorrow or next week. A friendly call to ensure things are on track is very useful in between milestones. It’s better than an unpleasant surprise at the end.

But maybe don’t tell your friend about a distracted 6 year old theory just before they board a plane. Especially if they’re not a keen flyer…

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CategoriesObserveTime

What An Unusual Year

2020 has almost come and gone. Life has been a little weird at times. And there are still two months to go. What an unusual year.

It feels like the months have dragged on since the beginning of the year. Though, in contrast, it feels like the year has flown past. Can you remember what you were thinking or doing in late February or early March?

Part of what makes this year stand out, obviously, is the coronavirus. It has impacted much of the planet in some way. Though it may have impacted some countries or states more than others. Policies such as lockdowns or closing shops and restaurants are being relaxed or tightened depending on the unique situations and who is actually in charge.

The British exit from the European Union is due to happen in just over 60 days as well. Although Brexit has impacted fewer people so far, it will start to have some impact on Brits, and many Europeans, in 2021.

The weather in Britain has been unusually pleasant to brilliant from March until now, which I hugely appreciate. Lots of sunshine and warm days. With enough rain to keep things fresh and green but not so frequent as to diminish our spirits.

Hopefully the year has allowed you to reflect on many things, as it has for me.

Two months remain. Make good use of them.

What an unusual year.

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CategoriesObserveTime

Advice For A 14 Year Old

The world has changed. It does that. Sometimes it tilts to good and sometimes it tilts to bad. However, advice for a 14 year old should probably look quite similar regardless of society, technology or wealth.

One idea for a 14 year old would be to take actions to get better at something, Aim to be in the top 5% within 12 months. The action required could be more revision to improve school test scores. It could also involve learning a sport, hobby or instrument. It is amazing what 20 minutes a day can do over 3 months.

Getting better at something increases confidence, helps people understand how learning, goals and discipline work. In addition, you learn about the compound effect of building skill upon skill, how habits help and also the key elements of time, effort and patience.

Learning to seek and find is another key piece of advice. Don’t wait for the coach to select you or a job to fall in your lap. Ask your parents, teachers or a search engine how you can improve. Decide what you want to try now and look into it. This may involve joining a club, watching YouTube highlights or how to clips. It could even mean getting a book from the library. Speak to several people to give you different perspectives.

This is advice for a 14 year old. It’s also good advice for a 41 year old.

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CategoriesObserveProgressReframe your thoughts

What Is Your Superpower?

Everyone has one. If you don’t know yours, you should have a little think about it. What is your superpower? How do you use it?

Kids tend to know their own superpower and that of the other kids. They know if the are brilliant and lightning quick at solving a Rubik’s Cube, like my son. He knew it because he could time himself. It became more obvious to him as children he didn’t even know would come up to him at school, hand him their cube and ask him to fix it for them. He always did. This was proof that others knew his super power too.

Remember, you can have more than one superpower. For example, Superman had incredible strength, heat vision and flight, to name a few. In contrast, you may not know of any power yet. Sometimes these are revealed at different times in life. It may be more about ‘when the student is ready, the teacher appears’. Or perhaps it is a matter of ‘seek and ye shall find’.

One other thing about this, is that your power may be underdeveloped. You will need to work at it, test it and experiment. It will grow stronger and you will be better able to control it as you work at it. You will need to have focus, discipline and persistence.

What is your superpower?

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CategoriesActionFinancialGratitudeHealth & FitnessObserveReframe your thoughtsThink About ItTime

Looking Back At 80

How will you look back on your life? What will be in it? What will have been worth the price you paid? Looking back at 80 is an important exercise to do many times when you are younger.

Imagine you are 80 years old. Can you look back over the span of 80 years and be filled with joy and contentment? There are a lot of tough questions in there. You will have to face your expectations versus reality gap and hope there is positive gap (reality ended up better) rather than a negative one.

It raises some helpful thoughts that should be considered throughout our lives. You might ask yourself the following questions. Am I living a good life? Should I spend more time and energy on family, career, finances, mental health, physical fitness or my community? How can I do more for others or myself? What will I accept or be happy with?

Its going to be harder to achieve anything once you reach your 80’s. There are many that keep going like Warren Buffett. However, you’ll have to have good genes, stay healthy and have a little luck on your side.

You may wish you had worked harder, studied more, saved more money or maintained better fitness. There is still time to change the outcome but you’ll have to put the effort in.

Looking back at 80 should be a delightful experience.

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CategoriesActionObserve

A Crowd Attracts A Crowd

Social proof is a very real and powerful thing. This is why one or two determined people can change the world. A crowd attracts a crowd and it all starts with someone.

Have you ever noticed how one person standing around looking at something can attract another? Then two or three more wander over to see what the fuss is about. Soon you have seven, 10 and then 25 people hovering about.

This is how buskers make a living. They know how to attract a few people, keep them engaged and then more people join. This is also how people build a social media presence. And how great sandwich shops build their reputation even more.

Having to make a reservation weeks in advance is another queuing system. Whether it is for a posh restaurant, hair salon, spa or to get tickets for an event, queuing up suggests demand. Demand indicates interest. The queue symbolises scarcity. Our nature is to crave those things that are scarce. If it was abundant, we would relax a little.

If you are selling something, it helps if there is scarcity, interest, demand and a queue. Make that happen and you will be on your way.

A crowd attracts a crowd. Try to make sure it is for good reasons.

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CategoriesObserveTime

It Depends

You’re unlikely to ever know the optimal route ahead. Just as you are unlikely to ever discover how your ’what if’ moments would have turned out. It depends on millions of actions, reactions and further ripples in your life and others.

Your tastes, perspectives and priorities can change. Whether it is due to time, age, company, awareness or some other matter, how you perceive things can adjust. This can be only slightly or a complete 180 degrees. Some people even do a 360 degree change. Just ask anyone who has divorced someone only to remarry them again later.

Life is such an exact and detailed process. Changing one tiny little thing, on a long trajectory, can land you in such a different place. This idea has been explored in so many different ways. One that springs to mind, as I am in London, is the movie Sliding Doors.

Often people will reflect back on their What If moment and decide everything would be the same, except that one thing better. Rarely do people think they would have died, been poorer, or been in any other less well off situation.

This type of thinking can easily lead back to the expectation versus reality gap. By exaggerating the heightened expectation against an unchangeable reality, you are likely to feel a slight depression. So don’t do that. We won’t ever know, because it depends.

Assume life would have been worse in any other scenario. If you want change, start now, not in the past.

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CategoriesActionGratitudeObserveTime

How Did I End Up Here?

Have you ever connected your dots? It is useful to understand what decisions, thoughts and moments brought you to right now. How did I end up here?

Over the last couple of years, I have looked back and reflected on key decisions I have made and how they affected the direction of my life. It’s a fascinating exercise. Even more so, if you can be fearless in examining why you have chosen to do something.

This can help you understand why you choose some things over others. It also lets you know more about what you value and what you are attracted to.

One pivotal moment, I recall, was being 19 and walking to a university lecture in Ottawa, Canada. I saw a flyer on the stairs and picked it up. It was about travelling to various destinations around the world. A minute later I had reached my class and finished reading the parts that interested me the most.

I sat down and turned to my friend Kevin. I declared that I would finish the term and then take a year off to travel around Australia, New Zealand and the South Pacific. Excited, I studied, planned and worked to make and save money. Several months later I was on a jet headed to Auckland.

‘How did I end up here?’, I thought.

But actually, I knew.

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CategoriesActionObserveReframe your thoughts

What Are You Attracting?

We know what we want. Most people know what they don’t want too. Maybe they know it better. However, what are you attracting?

We are always moving towards or away from people, things and ideas. In addition, people are constantly moving further from, or closer to us. What is it that brings them closer and what repels them away?

It’s an important thing to take note of and be aware of. For example, you may ask, ”Is it something I said?”. You might also wonder, “Is it my clothes, hair, physique, mindset, success or other particular thing or combination?”

People will be attracted to you, if they find you attractive. The people that you attract may be the ones you want in your group. However, sometimes they are not the types you wish to have around.

Consider who you are attracted to. Then reflect on why you are attracted to them. You will need to be specific. In addition, I suggest that you write it down so you are clear. Pull this piece of paper out once a week and add to it. But also learn from it by understanding what you see.

What are you attracting? Who are you attracting?

What would you like to be different? How will you adjust?

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CategoriesActionObserveReframe your thoughts

Your Source Of Frustration

Recently there seems to be growing tension and anxiety in the universe. If you are feeling it too, look into your source of frustration. This one simple step can resolve a lot of aggravation and challenging feelings.

Perhaps you know what gets you agitated already. It could be your partner, a family member, the media, your social media feeds, someone or something at work, or even the trains being delayed.

If you don’t know what it is that agitates you, then have a think about. Monitor yourself today and consciously notice when you start to get a bit more anxious or frustrated. Notice what you are doing at that moment. Are you watching, reading, listening, conversing or observing?

I notice quite a few people develop some tension while engaging in the news. One thing I have found useful is to stop reading much news. I have also noticed that so many ‘news’ outlets are actually ‘opinion‘ outlets. And many of these tend toward the negative.

It doesn’t matter what the information they are conveying is, there is always ‘a risk’ or ‘a problem’. Sometimes they highlight ‘incompetence’, ‘intolerance’ and ‘lies’. Most do not provide only the facts for you to consider. They feed you the anxious feelings too. This might make your head ache and you’ll be grumpy with others.

Reduce your source of frustration.

Tap into something new.

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