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Gratitude Health & Fitness Reframe your thoughts

Forgiveness And Empathy

Posted on October 10, 2020

I saw an incredible short video clip the other day. It had a real impact on me. The forgiveness and empathy conveyed was certainly an unexpected twist. The 3.5 minute clip is from Larry King Live. I have posted it below.

Imagine someone trying to kill you. They come very close to reaching their goal. However, somehow you pull through. How would you feel about that? Consider how you might feel with the memories of your physical pain, mental anguish and uncertain future fresh in your mind.

What sort of emotions might you have toward this intentional murderer? Would you like to see justice served? Maybe even a little revenge?

It’s hard to imagine the extreme scenario. Most people can’t summon up that level of intensity, fear and pain to replicate the situation well enough. This is especially true when you are considering it while sitting safely and snug at home or while comfortably on your regular commute.

If you can’t get into the scene and character, consider, the experience of others. Reflect on those that have been cut up on the motorway, been in an accident or lost someone in a tragic way.

Forgiveness and empathy help you move on with your life.

Expose yourself to it. Try it. Evolve.

Like him or not, it’s quite impressive how he views the shooter

Gratitude Health & Fitness Reframe your thoughts

Rain Can Cleanse Your Soul

Posted on October 7, 2020

Listening to the rain land rhythmically on the rooftops is like a serenade. If you’re dry, warm and comfortable, the sound of the rain can cleanse your soul.

I love hearing the rain fall and make that pitter-patter sound as it lands. There is something very base and refreshing about it. Even the air is a little different when it is raining. Getting cozy really helps.

Now I am not always that fond of being out in the rain. This is especially true when it is cold. Also when you are trying to do something outdoors and the rain isn’t helping.

Growing up on a farm, we had to use the weather to our advantage. You have to plant at the right time and cut hay during dry days. You don’t want to get your tractor stuck in the mud. Nor do you want to have rain on your hay before you bale it up and put it into storage. Wet hay is not good to have.

But I love a rain storm. Flashes of lightning illuminating the sky. Thunder rolling across the vast heavens above. Drops of rain pounding buildings and the ground. Storms always seemed too short. This just kept you wanting more.

Rain can cleanse your soul. Get absorbed by it and appreciate it’s primal power.

Action Observe Reframe your thoughts

What Are You Attracting?

Posted on October 6, 2020

We know what we want. Most people know what they don’t want too. Maybe they know it better. However, what are you attracting?

We are always moving towards or away from people, things and ideas. In addition, people are constantly moving further from, or closer to us. What is it that brings them closer and what repels them away?

It’s an important thing to take note of and be aware of. For example, you may ask, ”Is it something I said?”. You might also wonder, “Is it my clothes, hair, physique, mindset, success or other particular thing or combination?”

People will be attracted to you, if they find you attractive. The people that you attract may be the ones you want in your group. However, sometimes they are not the types you wish to have around.

Consider who you are attracted to. Then reflect on why you are attracted to them. You will need to be specific. In addition, I suggest that you write it down so you are clear. Pull this piece of paper out once a week and add to it. But also learn from it by understanding what you see.

What are you attracting? Who are you attracting?

What would you like to be different? How will you adjust?

Action Observe Reframe your thoughts

Your Source Of Frustration

Posted on October 3, 2020

Recently there seems to be growing tension and anxiety in the universe. If you are feeling it too, look into your source of frustration. This one simple step can resolve a lot of aggravation and challenging feelings.

Perhaps you know what gets you agitated already. It could be your partner, a family member, the media, your social media feeds, someone or something at work, or even the trains being delayed.

If you don’t know what it is that agitates you, then have a think about. Monitor yourself today and consciously notice when you start to get a bit more anxious or frustrated. Notice what you are doing at that moment. Are you watching, reading, listening, conversing or observing?

I notice quite a few people develop some tension while engaging in the news. One thing I have found useful is to stop reading much news. I have also noticed that so many ‘news’ outlets are actually ‘opinion‘ outlets. And many of these tend toward the negative.

It doesn’t matter what the information they are conveying is, there is always ‘a risk’ or ‘a problem’. Sometimes they highlight ‘incompetence’, ‘intolerance’ and ‘lies’. Most do not provide only the facts for you to consider. They feed you the anxious feelings too. This might make your head ache and you’ll be grumpy with others.

Reduce your source of frustration.

Tap into something new.

Observe Reframe your thoughts

Decoding Communications

Posted on September 30, 2020

Engaging with someone can be tricky business. There is a lot of room for error and misunderstanding. Decoding communications can be helpful but you need to be aware of the pitfalls.

Have you ever thought, “There is no way they can disagree with this point”. And then the other persons finds a way. Why is that? What happened between your very clear and concise thought and their response to it?

First there is your intent. That is reflected in how you say something. Are you being bossy, suggestive, argumentative or condescending?

Then there are also the words you use and the order you use them. Words can mean different things to different people at different times. For example, we often get a giggle at our house when referring to pants. For the Canadian parents, pants are trousers. Whereas the British children more commonly know pants as underwear. But there are other words which can elicit quite strong emotional responses.

There is also the element of who is saying it. “You are chatting again”, might have a very different impact on a couple of teenagers if it comes from their teacher. But if it is said by a friend at lunch time, it might come across with more humour.

Decoding communications can be challenging. These are just some of the issues you can encounter.

Reframe your thoughts Uncategorized

It’s Easier Than You Think

Posted on September 27, 2020

Everything is. If you do some research, use a model, develop a plan and follow it, you will be fine. It’s easier than you think, so don’t think too much. Just go do it.

However, sometimes things get a little difficult, challenging or hostile. Simply focus through that. Remain resilient. With a longer term vision, you know you’ll get there.

It’s certainly not impossible. Although some things are less likely. But if you are determined, disciplined and dynamic, you will press on and succeed. Few things are rocket science. Even rocket science isn’t what it used to be.

Think about that. 1903 was the first successful flight by the Wright Brothers. In less than 60 years (1961), President Kennedy announced the goal of landing a man on the moon that decade. A further 60 years on and we have several groups targeting a crewed Mars mission by the mid 2020’s.

That’s amazing! In just over 100 years humans have gone from can’t fly, to flying, to potential inter-planetary space travel. People are learning and applying at a phenomenal rate.

If we as a species can do that, imagine what you as an individual can do. Fortunately, there is a process for everything. And, if you follow the learn, plan, do and repeat model, you can, with some patience, achieve anything.

It’s easier than you think!

Reframe your thoughts Think About It

You Can’t Handle The Truth

Posted on September 25, 2020

Or can you? Are you willing to entertain facts that make you uncomfortable? Perhaps you can’t handle the truth when you’ve already created your desired reality. Some people can adjust the story when new facts come to light. Others cannot.

We know we make initial decisions based on emotion. Most people then search for facts or information, or even simply an opinion, to confirm we are justified in our thinking.

That’s one way to drift through the world. Someone did say ignorance is bliss. A friend once noted that you shouldn’t let the truth get in the way of a good story.

Be careful if you find yourself biased, blissfully ignorant and enjoying the story too much. It may not be comfortable, but you really should go find the people who are saying the opposite and understand what facts they are looking at. Then use your own mind to assess ALL the relevant data and come to a conclusion.

You don’t have to let people feed you their stories. Their agenda in influencing you to a certain way of thinking may not be the best thing for you. Some people are delighted if you are being gullible. You may be a servant to their special interest.

Perhaps you can’t handle the truth. Demand to know your truth. Like in that powerful scene from A Few Good Men.

Action Reframe your thoughts

We Choose The Meaning

Posted on September 23, 2020

Lots of things happen in our lives. Words are spoken and actions are taken. Regardless of what happens though, we choose the meaning of the words or actions. This is true whether we say the words or do the actions or whether someone else does.

These interpretations, judgements, reactions and decisions shape our present and our future. We can even make things align a certain way to create a new history.

I recall being frustrated by people in their car not letting me go in front of them when merging with traffic. I would assign a number of reasons why they wouldn’t let me in. Usually it was because they weren’t being very nice.

Then, one time, I was focused on the outer lane. By the time I saw the person wanting to come into my lane, it was too late to let them do it safely. I realised I was ‘that’ person. Another time I was in a hurry, and didn’t want to be slowed down, so didn’t let them in.

So, by having the experience myself, I realised that sometimes there are valid reasons that people do things. In addition, I thought that I should give people the benefit of the doubt. Especially as I believe people are generally good.

We choose the meaning of things so why not make it positive.

Action Progress Reframe your thoughts Time

Today Is The Day!

Posted on September 20, 2020

That’s right. It doesn’t even matter when you are reading this. Right now you can shift your life onto a new path. Today is the day!

Just saying that phrase can get the excitement levels up. You may also have to contend with some new level of anxiousness. But that is ok. This feeling can be channelled in a positive way. Your body is tingling. Some call it butterflies.

Regardless of what it is, it is more important how you perceive this feeling. And also what you will then do with it. You may simply be excited about getting extra energy into the day and making significant progress.

However, it may also be that you are expanding your comfort zone. This is great news. And of course it will feel a little uncertain or uncomfortable. But don’t focus on that. Or it could grow and get out of control.

Instead, focus that extra adrenaline and energy towards the desired outcome you’re seeking. This is a key step in shifting from uncomfortable to unstoppable. Harness this energy and use it to drive forward toward your desired result. This tactic will bring you one step closer to your goal.

If you do this repeatedly, you will achieve anything.

It is time to start.

Today is the day!

Action Progress Reframe your thoughts

To Compete Or Not Compete

Posted on September 18, 2020

That is the question. There is a fine line between being overly relaxed and taking things too seriously. To compete or not compete can be a very challenging question.

Whether it is at the country level, national, regional or local, this is not really a question. You train to win. However, before you get on that road, there is a period of life where winning isn’t everything. At least not to everyone.

As an individual, playing at park, school or local club level, there can be an element of playing too hard. Some children are there just to have some fun. Other children are only there because their parents are encouraging them to be there. Occasionally one child doesn’t want to be there at all.

However, to make it to progressively higher levels, one needs to challenge. So it stands to reason that if you want to play at the those levels, you may need to play harder at the younger age groups. However, some children may play too hard when the stakes are not very high.

This is not necessarily good or bad. It is simply something that people have to get through. Children and parents all have to be flexible enough to allow for both ends of the spectrum.

To compete or not compete. Simply keep getting better and it will all work out.