Scott's Thinking - Page 117 of 173

Getting Away From It All

Posted on July 23, 2021

How do you relax? Meditation is good. Having a nap can help. Watching a movie or going for a walk can do it for some folks. Getting away from it all may be the big one though.

A complete change of scenery and environment can do wonders for the mind, body and soul.

But getting away can mean many different things. Is it just away from your home? Or your neighbourhood? Could you go to a spa 10 miles away or do you need transcontinental travel?

Are you looking for adventure? Does action and excitement keep your mind focused and away from your daily life?

Some people prefer the serenity of a monastery. Others want to do yoga on a hilltop. Still others will go on amusement rides or play blackjack all night.

It really depends what you are looking for at this time in your life.

Mostly a change is as good as a rest, as the saying goes. Diversion of the mind can be quite a useful endeavour.

Regardless of what you do though, you’re best to come back rested, rejuvenated and ready to go.

Once you’ve had a taste of what does it for you, getting away from it all will never be the same.

Gratitude Time

When was the last time you said you were grateful for something? Who did you say it to? Gratitude is great if you actually do it. Writing it down and speaking it out loud are two great ways to express it well.

My daughter’s bedtime routine includes reflecting on the day and discussing what we are grateful for. Usually this part is done between my wife and daughter. This time was one for me though.

She asked me what three things I was grateful for today. Being asked the question by someone else creates a different level of importance on the question. You don’t really have to think about the question if you are doing it on your own. Just thinking about the idea of gratitude is enough to get you going. But it is not the same.

It was better to have the discussion. And I couldn’t be lazy or cop out with just one or two. It made me really think about what aspects of the day made me most grateful. It was such a good experience, I might try to do that more often with her.

I do write in a gratitude journal most mornings, though it is a little different. With my daughter it is out loud rather than written. Also, reviewing the day in the evening before sleeping can certainly help with recall.

Gratitude is great.

Observe Reframe your thoughts Think About It Time

It Is July 2025

Posted on July 21, 2021

What will you be doing? How will the world be coping? What will be happening? Imagine it is July 2025 right now. Are you happy with what you see?

Rather than wonder what you will be doing in 4 years from now, try something different. You can either research what some prognosticators are saying or make your own view. Of course when considering your own situation, it is likely you will have a better idea of the potential.

Who will be in power in the G7 countries? Who will be running your country? What will we know about COVID? What stats will we have? How will different countries be living with this?

Where will you be in your career? What about your close relationships? What will your finances look like? How old will your parents be?

If you have never written this down, you may find it quite an interesting exercise. Every time I do it, I think of other options I would like to have be true. In addition, when you look at things in the long run perspective, you tend to reduce emotional decision making. You also, get a greater sense of what could be possible for you. Also, you are more able to use facts and data rather than stories and unhelpful self-talk.

It is July 2025. Describe it.

Gratitude Observe Think About It

What Do You Believe?

Posted on July 20, 2021

When reading something, have you ever thought why you enjoy it or find it uncomfortable? What do you believe? Have you ever taken stock of what matters to you in life?

I remember a baseball movie from the 80’s where the lead character rhymed off what he believed in. I couldn’t remember all the details but I was impressed by his recount. It was impressive that he had actually thought about it and was quite clear about it. There was no pause, no slight hesitation or uncertainty.

Sometimes I have started to write out a list as well. It’s something I should continue. It seems like a reasonable thing to do, especially with the big topics in your life. Writing them out gives some glaring clarity too. You can’t simply play mind games with yourself. You can’t shift in a constant, ‘if this then that’, scenario.

Some people’s beliefs change depending on who is saying it. That is unfortunate but can happen. There are plenty of videos online which demonstrate this tendency.

Give it a try later today. Set aside 10 minutes and see how many core beliefs you can write into the notes section of your phone. Put them in there so you can review them occasionally. Reflect on them and adjust them as you consider them in the future.

What do you believe?

Action Gratitude Reframe your thoughts

Smile Through The Drama

Posted on July 19, 2021

Things sometimes go sideways. And they can go categorically wrong too. Those times that things don’t go well, smile through the drama if you need too.

Maybe the dog ate your homework, hat or cake. Perhaps you didn’t get the job you wanted, grade you needed or text you were waiting for. When these things happen, it can be easy to be annoyed or upset. Though I would encourage you to find something good or funny about the situation and smile.

Even if there is nothing good about the particular situation, that you can see in the moment, think of something nice and smile.

It is incredible how our thoughts can lead our body and our body can lead our thoughts. Just the simple act of smiling can start to make you feel uplifted. By making that facial expression, it is hard to not feel a little better.

This will also improve with practice. So if the first few times you do this, you can only manage a second or two, keep trying. The longer term benefits can be quite helpful in life. Being able to move yourself out of drama and into pleasantness will come in handy many times in life.

When life writes a twist in the play, smile through the drama.

Action Goals, Results & New Thinking Time

Pick One Thing

Posted on July 18, 2021

What is it that you really want before you go? What would you like to be, do or have to celebrate and enjoy? Pick one thing and decide right now that it is your goal.

Get specific around this goal. Be so clear in what you see that you can describe it in detail. Write down the date you would like the success to come. Write down the time and the place. Note who you are with as well as the temperature and weather.

Ideally it will be something in the next 5 years. However, you can make it 10 years at the maximum. Almost anything can be achieved in that time with focus, discipline and persistence. This is especially true if you work out a plan and work on it daily. You need some key milestones to ensure you are getting the compound effect.

Try making those milestones monthly. Pick a day and a time in the month that it will be done by. Be sure to write out the specifics, even if it makes you a little nervous to do so. You will gain confidence in your ability to achieve the goal as you move closer to it on a daily basis.

Pick one thing today and work toward it daily.

Gratitude Health & Fitness Think About It

Here’s To Volunteers!

Posted on July 17, 2021

Where would the world be without volunteers? I never fully appreciated how much they did for children and society. Here’s to volunteers!

When I was growing up in rural Canada, there was a volunteer fire department in one of the larger nearby towns. There were coaches for hockey, floor hockey and softball, amongst others. None of them were paid. Additionally, they were usually Dad’s and sometimes Mom’s who wanted to be involved with their children’s activities.

Now with my own children, I can see how much time and effort has gone into the many experiences they have enjoyed. Whether it was the local fair that is run by community members or school trips, so many activities require people to help out.

The school PTA, class trips to museums and parks, or some of the sporting activities, they all require some element of people making things happen without remuneration.

Many people do this work in addition to their job, ferrying kids around and organising their own lives. They organise football triangulars and the requisite car sharing. They also plan out training sessions, exercises and skill enhancement drills.

Today I was at an athletics event for my oldest son. There were lots of parents helping out. Whether it was raking the long jump pit, measuring throwing distances or timing the races, there was a lot to do. In addition, the coaches organised the day including sorting out who was to do which event. It worked very well. It was an entire day.

Without the coaches and the parents, the kids would not have had an athletics event to attend, enjoy or excel at.

Here’s to volunteers!

Action Gratitude Think About It

Choosing Your Charity

Posted on July 16, 2021

Deciding which charity to support is straightforward for some. However, it can also be quite haphazard. Choosing your charity is a personal choice. It can be based on a singular reason or be multifactor.

I had a policy that if friends or colleagues asked me to sponsor them for their activity, I would. And if it involved a children’s charity, I would donate £20. All others would get £5, £10 or £15. Some years I had quite a few requests.

Sometimes I would be so busy at the time of the request, I would forget. Other times they would be on a new charity platform that I had to sign up to. That didn’t always work because if it wasn’t quick and easy, it wouldn’t get done.

We donate to other charities too, based on a few criteria. Although one we support is just because they came to our door and the kids thought we should do it because the person was so nice.

If someone you know is being, or has been, impacted by something, that can make the choice a lot simpler. Also, if your family has always supported a certain charity, you might inherit that habit too.

I do recall the phrase, ‘Charity begins at home.’ This is a good idea. Although it is nice to branch out a little and spread it amongst the community. Not everyone has a family that can help them.

Choosing your charity is a personal decision. How do you decide?

Action Think About It

Set Boundaries

Posted on July 15, 2021

We all need a little structure in our lives. Not too much, of course. However, some can be quite beneficial. Set boundaries too and you are likely to have a happier life.

These boundaries can be with friends, family, co-workers and even your partner. We have many unspoken and unwritten boundaries. These are simply cultural norms for people.

The norm could come from their family culture. Although this could differ from their religious culture. This in turn could be slightly adjusted when it comes to a regional or national culture.

I lot of people think groups are quite homogenous. That would make life, sorting and interactions so much simpler. However, it really isn’t that clear cut.

People have a view of Canadians and lump them altogether. It’s great when they say they are fun, kind and nice. However, people have different boundaries, depending on which province they are from, which city or which group.

French speakers from Quebec may be more tactile than English speakers from Toronto. The former may stand slightly closer and the later slightly further away. It may be just nuanced but boundaries can shift.

You should think about your own boundaries, in terms of physical, mental and spiritual. What is comfortable for you? And realise that those boundaries may be different from people that grew up in a different culture.

Set boundaries that work for you.

Action Reframe your thoughts Time

Shrug And Move On

Posted on July 14, 2021

If you want to improve a frustrating situation, sometimes you need to try a different tactic. Rather than get debating, simply shrug and move on.

There have been some times in my life where I would engage in deep debates or discussions on topics. These were usually hot topics of the day, but most had a common ever-present theme.

So I know it can be very easy to get caught up in a misunderstanding or a disagreement. And you really should understand which it is at first. You should also figure out what your intent is and what the intent of the other party is.

If your intent is to convince the other party that you are ‘right’, then you are probably in for a long, frustrating discussion. Same thing if that is their intent. However, if you are both sitting down to calmly understand the data the other person has, that can be different. Especially if you are both working toward reasonable steps to improve the situation.

Otherwise, why give it energy? If their opinion, or what you assume is their opinion, is not to your liking, ignore it. Save yourself some time and mild anxiety and continue with your day.

You may wish to try to understand why you object to their viewpoint. But also try looking at it from their perspective and why they may have that position. You can’t mind read but you can try to consider what situations might have lead them to this perspective. Try to think of 10 to 15 because the ones that come ready to you are often your own biased stereotypes.

For peace of mind, build up or shrug and move on.