CategoriesActionReframe your thoughts

Look Where It Should Be First

When looking for files, phone numbers, keys, glasses or information, look where it should be first. It might be there. If it isn’t, make a note of where you thought it should be. Then, when you find it, put it where it should be. Then you’ll find it easier next time.

Sometimes I’ll start looking where I think I saw the item last. Other times I head for where somebody says they saw it (or they think they did). Boy do we laugh when I find the item in the eighth place I look. This would have been the first place if I had simply ignored all other impulses and input.

Do you ever do that with general information? Ever casually wish you knew the answer to a question or had more information about a subject? Despite some of the most used phrases being, ‘Google it’ and, ‘Check the net’, sometimes I just don’t.

Occasionally I assume the topic is too difficult to search. Or even that no one would have searched this before. And I might even wonder if maybe there just won’t be any information on the topic.

However, I‘ve always been pleasantly surprised at how easy, predictive and plentiful the searches and results have been. So I search everything now.

So whether it is physical or theoretical, look where it should be first.

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CategoriesActionReframe your thoughts

Put Things Back Where They Belong

Ah, yes. How much time would this save people during their lifetime? If everyone put things back where they belong, life would be a little easier.

How many tense minutes have you lost over the years trying to find things? Sometimes it’s the car keys and sometimes people forget where they put their phone or their credit card. Glasses and sunglasses are another crowd favourite.

And don’t get me started on the number of times people forget where they put their drink. Of course the bottles, cans and glasses that are half full are always found by the host during clean up when everyone has left.

Poor filing, either online or in traditional filing cabinets can be a major source of wasted time. This is particularly true for those still using a plastic bag, drawer or corner of their desk or bedroom floor for filing their critical documents.

I’ve become mildly obsessed over the years with returning things to “their spot”. I believe it is ideal that everything has its proper or best place. Then that thing should be returned there immediately after using it.

Do not place it anywhere else, even just for a minute. It has the potential to languish there in that new, unfamiliar spot.

Put things back where they belong. This is a key path to happiness, success and calm.

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CategoriesObserveThink About ItTime

A Time And A Place

Everything belongs somewhere at some time. You might think of the Spacetime continuum when you read this. Having a time and place is natural. Though not everything will exist in the time and place of your preference.

At one moment a bowl will exist in your cupboard. Then it will be moved to the table for cereal or soup. It may then find itself in the dishwasher before being returned to the cupboard.

It may be your favourite bowl. However, someone in your house may have used it. So perhaps it wasn’t where you wanted it to be when you wanted it there. Let’s say it was dirty and in the dishwasher when you wanted to use it.

This is the way life is. Everything has a time and a place. But it may not be according to your desires. Besides, there seems to be too many places on Earth and in the universe for you to dictate where every single item should be and when.

So at those moments you find yourself trying to control too much with your Jedi capabilities, it’s time to let it go. Where focus goes, energy flows, as Tony Robbins says.

So put things in the best place you can at this time. Accept things are in the best place, if you can’t change them. And focus on the exact changes you wish to make.

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CategoriesActionGratitudeThink About It

Here To Help

Perhaps our highest purpose is in helping others. Even if you set out to simply make money, you usually need to help others to do it. We are here to help others on their journey.

People assist others whether through charity, providing a service or product or at random moments. If someone looks lost, you give them directions. When someone has been hurt, you will come to their aid or find someone who can.

And although you can look at many things as ‘only doing it for the money’, that is just a viewpoint. Most people aren’t brutally honest with themselves about their own motivations. How do they think they can assess what someone else is thinking?

Landlords help people find homes to live in. Car companies help people get around. Computer companies help people have access to information, communication and speed. Restaurant workers assist people in getting food and drink without the effort of sorting it themselves.

Think of almost any job and you can see how the person’s work aids other people.

There is a spectrum of people that moves from totally not helpful to exceptionally helping. But apart from allowing for a handful of super hard core non-helpers, everyone else helps to some degree. They do so with time, effort, money or kindness.

How are you helping people today?

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CategoriesActionReframe your thoughts

Breaking Free Of Yourself And Others

Recently I wrote about holding ourselves back by not, ‘becoming one of them’. Our tribes don’t want that either. Breaking free of yourself and others is critical but also quite difficult.

You may have heard of ‘Crab Mentality’ or ‘Tall Poppy Syndrome’ or ‘Law of Jante’. These are all quite similar. They refer to a certain cultural phenomenon around the world. It’s called different things in different countries. Click on the coloured text above to find out more.

Essentially, people don’t like others leaving their group. They certainly get more anxious if the person leaving is joining a better group from their perspective. People tend to have a difficulty with this.

Sometimes it is as simple as they like you and don’t want to see you less. But sometimes it can be more sinister than that. Sometimes people can be spiteful because they don’t want you to get ahead of them in life. This seems to be particularly true when it comes to others succeeding in a career or earning more money.

Certainly try not to be the type of person to hold onto others in your group. This is important if they are doing better for themselves. Congratulate them and wish them well. Karma will then be on your side.

Breaking free of yourself and others is not easy. And if someone tries to hold you back? Run away!

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CategoriesActionReframe your thoughts

Let Children Be Bored

For many, this might seem counter-intuitive. What about planning and preparing their whole day? If you let children be bored, they will come out the other side of it with a new perspective.

Yes, there may be some whining or complaining for a little bit. However, they will get through that phase and you will too. Be patient.

Children that are bored eventually find something to do. This is often helped if you give some casual suggestions like, ‘read a book‘, ‘build a website‘, or ‘fold these clothes’.

The sooner they learn how to figure out ‘what’s next?’, the sooner they will further develop their independence. Sure there may be some tense moments as you both work through the uncertain and uncomfortable challenges. Though the beauty is on the other side of the chrysalis.

Often, when we are bored, we find out what we really enjoy doing. We will also appreciate things a lot more. We pull out books, toys, and games that we forgot we had. Kids will find the magic that they had forgotten. In addition, they have the satisfaction of setting their own agenda.

So if you want to see greater confidence and independence in your child, let them be bored. You will appreciate it someday and so will your kids.

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CategoriesActionThink About ItTime

What’s Next?!

To keep a good pace going, you need to make decisions and move on. Decision velocity is important. Asking yourself and others, ‘What’s Next?!’ is a good way to keep things flowing.

It’s short and easy. It’s clear and concise. Ask this question as soon as you’ve finished your last item. Make this a habit. When you’re working, don’t let a second drift by without you starting on the next item.

You will build up quite a rhythm. You will also notice you get a lot more done. When you are asking yourself great questions like this, your mind can focus. It knows the answer to ‘What’s next?!’.

Your mind will sort, measure and assess what the options are and then let you know what is next. This is great because there is a natural flow and prioritisation to it.

It’s also a good signal to your mind, and to others, that the previous topic has been closed. You’re done with that and moving on. It feels engaged, decisive, and crisp. It feels like good leadership.

I like it better than, ‘Shall we move on’ and some of the other phrases out there.

Give it a try a few times today. Test it and see how you like it. Hopefully, it will work for you as well as it has for others.

Whats next?!

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CategoriesActionReframe your thoughts

Never Miss A Day

So you really want to change your life. Well today will be the day that turns your whole life around. Today you will decide, commit and never miss a day.

That’s the secret to success.

You can make it more complicated. Sure there are many, many other factors you could consider. You could note the leader of the day isn’t your cup of tea. A person could cite transnational agreements and changes in the local laws.

However, it comes down to reasons or results.

Which one will you focus on? I suggest you spend your time planting seeds and taking care of them every day. Do everything the successful growers of those seeds say to do. You can listen to people with opinions and no results, if you wish. But don’t be surprised if you get similar results.

Maybe you want to run faster, lose weight, inhale only air, start a business, get a promotion or change jobs. If so, you need to decide and commit to it. You need to plan out the days, weeks and months ahead. Have a vision and a plan. Then take action and the results will appear.

Then you will need to execute and never miss a day!

207 daily blog posts in a row and I have not missed a day yet. Share this post with someone who is committed, likes thinking or is making changes in their life.

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CategoriesObserveReframe your thoughts

Parenting Predicts People’s Personality

If you would like to know how someone will be in 20 or 40 years, look at their parents. Parenting predicts people’s personality so the apple won’t fall far from the tree.

Whether we like it or not, parenting is a glimpse into the past and the future. If you would like to see how your future partner might be, observe their parents. If you are curious about what your kids might be like when they grow up, look very closely at your personality and what you model in front of them.

Observe your parents more, if you want to really start understanding yourself. Listen to their words, focus and challenges. Review your life and see which personality traits are more like your Mom‘s or your Dad‘s. Are they their good traits or the one’s you are not so fond of?

Sometimes it’s easier to see your own traits (especially any negative ones) in someone else first.

If you are not fond of any of the traits you’ve picked up over the years, you can change them. It’s rarely easy but always possible. Best time to train your brain out of some of those habits is before you have children. Second best time to do it is right now.

If parenting predicts people’s personality, assess yours today and make any desired changes now.

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CategoriesActionReframe your thoughtsTime

Everything Starts With A Decision

If you want your life to be different, you need to check off a few decisions. You know which ones. Everything starts with a decision so it’s time to get started.

What decisions have you been putting off? Let’s get into those topics and understand them better. You may even discover a few helpful things about yourself in the process.

Are you avoiding a decision? Have you said you would think about it and then promptly ignored it? What is it that is holding you back from making the decision and diving in?

Someone has to make a decision and if you don’t, someone else will. Don’t wait until the choice is no longer yours. Get determined. Become selfish, in a good way, by putting your needs ahead of all the other people and ideas rolling around in your head.

Stand up straight. Say what you want. Make the decision to go for it. Commit to it and move forward by taking the very next step right now. It will feel so good! It may be a little scary, uncomfortable or anxiety-inducing. However, remain calm and keep going.

Everything starts with a decision. Start making a few and get on with your new life today.

Do it now!

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