There is a lot of opportunity to get involved. Start looking for your impact zone. You are amazing. You can do something.
I am only one; but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; I will not refuse to do the something I can do.
Helen Keller
What is the something you can do today?
Thinking is a fascinating activity. The inner workings of the mind and all that activity inside the brain. It can be like a Genie’s lamp. Whatever you wish, if you think you can, you will.
Try to visualise ‘thinking‘ actually happening. What do you see? Not the brain. That is where the thinking happens but it is not thinking itself. Do you see thoughts or ideas? Do you see words, or pictures or gas and synapses firing?
Regardless of whatever it is you see thinking as, it is happening. The untapped potential power is incredible. You simply need to decide what you want and your mind can start organising the steps to get there. It can be like having a very efficient concierge.
Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right,
Henry Ford
If this is true, then why do we ever think something won’t work or that we can’t do the thing we want to do? If you go forward confidently, it follows that, ‘If you think you can, you will’. We would all get much more done that way.
I recall preparing for the first year out from school, that I took off to travel, and also my move from Ottawa, Canada to London, England. At those times, I thought I could and I did. There wasn’t hesitation and I didn’t think about couldn’t. Though there were many that thought about that for me. I simply followed the steps my inner concierge laid out for me.
Pick some things you would like to do this year. Decide that you can, and you will, do whatever it is. Write the ideas down quickly. Then let the concierge in your head start making a plan and preparing a path. Soon enough you’ll be on your way.
Don’t look back. Stay focused. Remain confident and resolute. If you think you can, you will.
Remember we have the power to change our minds, our views and our destiny. Remember The Titans is a brilliant family movie that does a great job delivering on that theme.
Friday night is movie night in our family. With five opinions, it can be challenging to get consensus on what we are going to watch. However, after several other trailers, a debate and a vote, we then watched this trailer and it was a unanimous winner. Although I had seen it before, I was keen to see it again. This time I would get to see the kids’ reactions too.
Well the kids loved it. We did too. It is a very inspiring movie. In addition, it really makes you think. Tough choices are made, different viewpoints are explored. The idea of tough love and long term personal development are key elements. Although set only 50 years ago, it seems like such a different time.
While we are experiencing extra family time, if you are looking for a great, feel good, family movie, then Remember The Titans is certainly worth watching.
Common Sense media suggests it is a 10+ age group movie (but was fine for our almost 9 year old). Rotten Tomatoes audience score is 93% from 578k ratings.
We are always looking for great movies for the whole family to watch. If you have any family favourites that you would be happy to share, please do. Tap the title of this post, scroll to the bottom of it and begin writing in the Start Discussion box.
What are the best resources for resilience? When you are feeling low – where do you go? To whom or to what do you turn to? There are some great resources out there to help pick you up, re-energise and re-focus.
Certainty of outcome:
Right now, we are in such a unique moment in time. It feels like the whole planet is on the same page, or at least reading the same book. Sometimes, as with a riveting book, I’d love to sneak a peak at the last few pages. Seeing how this plays out, and when, would provide everyone with some certainty. It would probably give a lot of people a level of comfort and let them relax into it a little more.
However, just like every book or movie, we won’t know how it ends until we get there. We need to live through the twists and turns with resilience knowing there is an end and it will be fine.
Perspective:
Looking back four months ago, you may not have realised how amazing your life was then. As I wrote recently, we often don’t know what we’ve got til it’s gone. This is probably one of those moments for a large portion of the population in so many countries already.
Feeling low – Where do you go?:
To re-energise or re-frame things, some of the best tips I have, that work for me are: Going for a run, writing something positive in a journal, listening to a favourite couple of songs rather loudly and singing along, or writing what’s on my mind to ‘get it out’.
A great book to read, and write in like a workbook, is Dale Carnegie’s classic, ‘How to stop worrying and start living’. It’s got some incredible stories in it and great lessons and tactics to use too.
There are also some amazing resources online. These are based in the UK, but please add any from your country or others you think would help. Free therapy or counselling through the NHS. Info for Children and young people.
Helping Others:
If you can spare a minute, please answer the question, ‘Feeling low – where do you go?’. Click on the title of this post and scroll to the bottom of the page and leave your best tips in the comments.
With readers from across the UK, USA, Canada, Australia and dozens of other countries, maybe we could get a little compendium of top tips listed. It could help people, from around the world, to better deal with the new normal.
Knowing that you may may have helped someone get through their day will pick you up too, and hopefully leave you smiling.
If you expect people and things to be perfect, then you may be in for some pretty big disappointments in life. If you are starting with perfect, every other outcome is, sadly, going to be inferior.
I find my own frustrations rise when I use the word ‘should’. It’s a funny word. It’s how we think things ought to be based on our experience, desired pleasure and avoidance of pain. So why should any of us get to decide all on our own how things should be? Be careful if your base case is always starting with perfect. Especially if it is your particular view of perfect.
This reminds me of a Jim Rohn quote.
Jim Rohn
Jim has so many brilliant sayings. Search for him on YouTube, Google or click here.
Should is a word we gently encourage our children to use less and less. Unless they are going to take action and push for the change themselves, then that is fine. In which case, the word switches from ‘should’ to ’must’. Tony Robbins is known for saying that we don’t get our ’shoulds’, we only get our ’musts’.
If you think everything should be different, you will find life to be a constant battle. But, if you can accept that nothing is perfect, you will thrive. All those imperfections create diversity and uniqueness. It can be amazing, if you let it be.
You should give it a try. ??
It would be nice to be able to solve all the problems in the world with a snap of the fingers. Yet, if you simply do what you can, you will have done more than most people do in a given circumstance.
We can easily talk ourselves out of doing something because we don’t think it will make a massive difference. However, by doing what we can, it might. Making an impact can happen in so many ways. It is difficult to foretell which of your actions will make a significant difference and which won’t.
On that basis, I suggest you do the following.
Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.
Theodore Roosevelt
I think most people like to think that they think their own thoughts. But beware, you’re being influenced. Your thoughts are not always your own.
Thinking can be hard and confronting. Understanding a point of view and dissecting it without emotional baggage, bias, or stereotype can be a challenge.
I’m from the school of thought that people make emotional, instinctive decisions immediately and then search for data to confirm their point of view. It probably stems from millennia of survival instinct conditioning. Beware of anything that is different, as it could harm or kill you. Assess it and look for data that may or may not be right or wrong or even useful.
However, often you will look to find data that confirms your emotional decision. That emotional decision will be based on your prior experience, especially from when you were quite young. So this feedback loop becomes quite self-reinforcing if you are not careful.
Oftentimes people start only following one newspaper, or a collective of sources that all view things a similar way. This seems normal because it can be quite comforting to read things that are in line with our view. Though it is not a great substitute for thinking.
Sometimes content producers try to lead you down a road that isn’t helpful in general, but does suit their personal bias.
Think about this. Really play with it in your head. Are you actually critically thinking things through with your own thoughts, or are you letting someone tell you what they want you to think?
I enjoy a thought provoking exchange. Especially if it is in pursuit of really understanding something or solving a particular problem. It is important to check your intent before you engage in discussion. Are you arguing to win, convince or prove your point or are you engaging to improve your depth of consideration and thought?
Don’t let me influence you though. Think for yourself. Challenge your thoughts, biases, misconceptions and understanding. Consider this when consuming your normal news channel, newspaper, online news, social media, etc. Have you become, comfortably numb?
Beware, you’re being influenced.
Stuffocation, minimalism, the KonMari Method. It’s all there to get you to Declutter: Get it out!
Education phase:
Quite a few years ago, I found myself quite deeply involved in a decluttering phase. I was reading books, watching videos, and listening to podcasts. My days were focused on practicing the techniques and getting rid of things that I was inadvertently collecting.
I noticed that the minimalists had the right idea as far as bringing stuff into the house was concerned. The best thing to do was not to bring new things into your home. The only exception was when you knew exactly where you were going to put them.
Changing Habits:
Well, my newspaper and magazine habit had been thinning out for years before this anyway. However, now I would gather even fewer of them in a month. I also committed to throwing them in the recycle bin before I entered the house. By doing so they couldn’t lurk on a table or other surface for weeks.
If I did not throw it away on my way in, I would give myself three days to read or recycle it. If it wasn’t important enough now to squeeze it into my day, when will I ever make the time. The merely interesting must be binned quickly. The compelling will have time allocated.
Sort for Joy:
The ‘Declutter: Get it out!’ types also had a key message. Bit by bit, get rid of it. Sort out a drawer to get some momentum. Then maybe a cupboard.
As Marie Kondo would suggest, the item must bring you joy if you are going to keep it. I was a little sceptical of the term at first, but now I use it all of the time to weed things out at home and also at the point of consumption. Does it bring me joy.
Tips toward success:
Anyone who has ever been on a diet will recognise this truism: It is easier to keep it out than get rid of it later. So if you are going to put significant effort into decluttering (or weight loss), focus on being a disciplined minimalist when it comes to consumption.
One of the best tips came from the minimalists. Take a picture of the thing and then give it away. For most things, the picture will be enough to bring back the memory of the item, event or time.
Now may be a great time to declutter and give your space a little Spring clean. You’ll feel amazing clearing out a drawer, cupboard or whole room! The whole process can be quite liberating. Good luck with it!
(fyi, if you found the Coronavirus Exit Strategy post compelling, you may find its follow up article worth reading. It considers the next 2-3 years living like this, under lockdown, and some alternatives. Find it here.)
Attitudes are contagious. Are yours worth catching?
Dennis Mannering
I read a friend‘s Facebook post this morning where he noted we were in the middle of one of the greatest periods of uncertainty. Are these uncertain times? I should rephrase that to, ”Is it any more uncertain than usual”?
I believe I understood what he was saying, and on the surface I agreed, but it got me thinking.
Yes, probably most of us feel uncertain about the future right now and where this whole crazy situation is going to lead us. Though is that uncertainty any different from March 2019? Or are we simply more aware of the uncertainty?
Life is entirely uncertain. In the future at least.
There is no certainty around when you will meet your perfect match or fall in love. We don’t know if today we will get a call from an old friend, have a heart attack or fender bender, or find a £5 note on the ground.
We pretend there is certainty in our daily lives. We might like to think our lives are stable and not changing. But it is an illusion. We have our routines and expectations which help keep us calm and help us to believe there is certainty. Though, at any second, that routine can be changed by an external factor: Good or bad.
I think we live with constant change and constant uncertainty. Fortunately we don’t usually think about our future as much as we do right now.
