Tag: Fair

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Play Fair

Posted on July 7, 2024

Just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should. Play the game in the spirit of which it was intended, not how far you can bend the rules to your favour.

It’s nice to win. It is also nice to be the party in power. However, people don’t like being played or seeing things that truly seem unfair.

The pendulum swings harder and further to the other side when people try to keep it in their favour too long.

Enjoy your time at the top but learn how to let go and let the natural changes occur.

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Firm But Fair

Posted on February 15, 2021

This is one of my favourite sayings. It is a great way to ensure you do your best to treat people the same way as you treat others. Firm but fair means that there is a firmness with which you are ok with because it is based on being fair. I believe it is easier to stand your ground on issues when you know you are being fair.

Sometimes the item to be done is a non negotiable. It really must be sorted out. This is where you need to apply some firmness. This may mean that you appear tougher on your staff or your children.

When you are being fair, it helps to know what is being discussed. Some understanding of how things have progressed to this point can be useful before weighing in on the situation. If one parent has said ok to something, demanding it be otherwise sends a confusing message.

One example of putting this point into practice is when the children are playing video games. It is often easier to extend their time and pretend that it is all fine.

Though the best thing to do is to be firm on the agreed playing time and assist them in transitioning to another activity. If you had agreed up front how things were going to be, you need to be firm in the face of challenge and opposition.

Firm but fair. Stay resolute.

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Life Isn’t Fair

Posted on November 8, 2020

We all want life to be fair. We want a fair match when we watch sports, a fair hearing in court and a fair interview in our career. However, life isn’t fair. Or at least, most people can’t see how it is fair in some circumstances.

I have found that remembering that life isn’t fair is very helpful during challenging times. It comes back to the expectation versus reality gap. If you expect life to be fair, every time you don’t think it is, you will be frustrated.

My children hear this phrase frequently too. I remind them that life doesn’t always look fair in the present, the short run or the long run. However, it may be fair eventually, particularly if you believe in karma. Or it may never be fair, especially if you don’t believe there is an entity watching and keeping score.

Though I do suggest to them that they can try to make life fairer by their own thoughts and actions. If someone is having a bad day, they can try to make it better with a kind word or a small token. They can also play by the rules of the game and ensure the people on their team do too.

Life can be tough and life isn’t fair. But we have a responsibility to try to ensure it is as fair as possible.

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