Think about all that you could smile about. Put some effort in. Perhaps you have decent health without much effort. Maybe you have good relationships. It might even be that you have more money at the end of the month than expenses.
These are all great reasons to smile. Start smiling as you wake up and as you go through the day. Train the smile muscles, both in your mind and on your face. Your life will improve in line with your efforts in this area.
And then you learn something new. Maybe you stumble upon a new idea or you hear something differently then ever before.
The quote attributed to Albert Einstein springs to mind, “The more I learn, the more I realise I don’t know”. Something similar is also attributed to Socrates. Mark Twain and most parents have also said something along those lines, especially in the direction of their children.
To learn more, pause. You should pause more and consider what is being discussed. Does it make sense to you? What about to people who think differently to you? How could you see this differently if you wanted to learn something rather than celebrate being right?
10 billion people have walked this Earth. Every single one of them have had different experiences and interactions. Until we’ve seen everything through 10 billion lenses, we still have an opportunity to learn new things.
If you’re agreeing with your news media’s angle all or most of the time, go find someone or a media that states the opposite. Yes, it will make you uncomfortable. But you’ll find out what nearly half the country think.
This will give you insight most others will never know. If you nod knowingly to your media all the time, it just means you enjoy your bias. That makes you half as wise as you could be.
You choose how to think. And what you will let ruminate in your mind. Why would you choose anything but positive thoughts. Make it a habit.
Are you going to the best spot for the results you want? Have you thought much about it? Where do you fish? Clearly, the best place is where the fish you want are swimming.
Too many times we ask the wrong people or the wrong question. It is often easier to ask a friend what they think rather than ask someone who might be in a better position to answer.
If you want to catch salmon, you are best not to fish in a lake with only trout and bass. And if you don’t know where to catch salmon, asking your trout fishing buddies might not get the best answer.
By all means, do ask your trout fishing buddies though. They may also like salmon fishing, have been salmon fishing or knows a relative or friend who loves it. It’s a good place to start, especially if you are out on the lake spending time fishing.
But don’t stop there. Go online. Find out where salmon tend to live. Watch videos, read articles or call a salmon fishing shop or tour operator. You will get a variety of ideas and points of view. Some will be repetitive, some unique, some useful and some will be of little use at all.
Apply this search method to everything including getting medical information, finding a job, looking for clients and finding a partner – business or personal.
Where do you fish? This can make all the difference.
When did you last do this? It can change your life if you do it. Many people are so busy getting through life, they don’t stop and think.
Take 15 minutes later this evening and consider some things. If you are really brave, get a pen and some paper and write out your thoughts. I say brave because it is rarely comfortable confronting the brutal facts of reality.
Now I suggest you write out some of the great highlights of your life first. You may be able to note down 12 years of schooling or an advanced degree. Perhaps you’ve travelled or have had an illness you’ve had to overcome. Maybe you donated some money to a friend that was doing some fundraising. You may also have maintained a successful relationship, built a career, bought a house, raised good children or simply made it through life to here.
Well congratulations! There are so many skills you have and so many more you could acquire. You are far better and more impressive than you give yourself credit for. And you can do so much more than you even begin to imagine.
Recall all those times you got the thing you wanted. You bought the car, went to the concert, got the job or went out on that date. When you really wanted something, you went after it. You got it or something similar.
What else do you really want? How serious are you about it?
Stop and think. You can achieve anything.
Now, go make it happen.
Reacting is easy. It rarely requires thought. A person says or does something and you weigh in with your comments. You don’t have to think but it helps.
Why does it help if you pause and reflect on things before engaging your mouth? First of all, you probably only know the tip of the iceberg. Secondly, what you do know is likely biased by the provider of the information. Thirdly, your immediate opinion will be biased by your own experience and philosophy. Finally, you may not truly believe what you say. You may instead be giving an emotional response without clear balance.
In our fast paced society, many people have a tendency to see from one angle and comment from one perspective. It has also become more common to side with the purported underdog. We must take the time to improve this. Otherwise, we will find more people shouting and arguing over biased headlines without any substance.
Slow things down. Assess how everything progressed to where it is now. Acknowledge what you feel is the right answer. But then, take some time to explore alternative viewpoints. Remember, just because you don’t want gravity to exist doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.
If you want a calmer, more enjoyable life, try this out. You don’t have to think but it helps.
Predicting the future is a funny game. We do think we are pretty good at guessing what will happen next. I can see the future and it looks exciting!
The key to understanding predications is the following. The more control you have over the process, the more likely the outcome. So, for example, the lady running the roulette wheel in a casino has more control over the outcome than you. It depends on how she spins the wheel and throws the ball. You have no control.
You have more control with blackjack, though the deck is stacked against you. However, a diet and exercise regime is heavily in your control or sphere of influence. So you can see the pounds melt away through reduced calories, body toning and strengthening. All in your control.
So now do that with your life. Look deep into the future. Imagine the infinite possibilities. Where would you like to end up? If you could choose anywhere, and you can, where would it be?
So decide what you are looking for and then go after it. Be sensible, make a plan, take provisions and be hopeful. Then start. The road may be a little rocky at first. But stick with it. Slowly but surely you will get there.
I can see the future. And now I am going to make it happen.
Generalising can be useful. However, it can also be quite unhelpful. When someone uses them too liberally, generalisations hurt.
Positive references are fine to be generalised, such as “These children all look thirsty”. However, try to steer clear of using any general comment if there is a negative connotation to it.
Some people like to use sweeping statements as a shortcut. For example, “Americans are X”, “Children aren’t capable of Y” and “This city is a disaster” are too broad in their scope. When you identify something you aren’t happy with, please try to single out the specific person or situation. Otherwise, this is where a lot of isms and ists are born.
A whole movement can be created when a couple of dozen or a few hundred people act in a certain way but it is extrapolated across 50 million. I do believe that most people have a hard time knowing what their Mom, spouse, kid or boss thinks. So how do people feel they can accurately group thousands or millions of people in any meaningful way?
I know it feels better to have a large group of people with you. And it is easier to comment on whole groups of people. But, expediency and magnitude will exacerbate the problem. Unfortunately, one needs to take time and get specific to identify the actual issue that needs attention.
Generalisations hurt. Generally speaking.
Just get rid of everything! That is one way to do things. Although, it doesn’t seem like the right thing to do. With babies and bathwater, one should be discerning with regards to what stays and what goes.
“Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater”, is an idiomatic expression that struck me this morning. In general, it means don’t make the error of eliminating something good while trying to remove something bad.
In addition, it has been interpreted in a more extreme way whereby you should not throw out the essential (the baby) and keep the bathwater due to excessive zeal.
This idiom can be seen in action today with how different people perceive the US President Donald Trump. Some say that it is not just his tone and language (the bathwater) that they dislike on their preferred media channels. They would like to see him go too, despite the many good things he has done for the USA.
Now, anyone can level criticism at him and his policies because nothing is perfect. A person can always find a negative angle for things and people they don’t like or wish to contrast with some idea of perfection. You can even find harsh critics of Mother Theresa.
Throughout life you will have choices. Make them calmly after you consider your bias. And always remember babies and bathwater.
