CategoriesGratitudeReframe your thoughtsTime

Don’t Wish It Away

Sure things could be different. Maybe they could be better too. Though maybe this is better than the alternative. Don’t wish it away in any case.

Who knows what tomorrow brings. The grass is always greener. So don’t throw away today to gamble on tomorrow being better for you in the way that you want. It might happen. But what are the odds? How many of the last 7,000 or 14,000 days have turned out precisely as you had hoped and dreamed?

Together, all of those days make up the great tapestry of your life. Ups and downs, triumphs and tribulations, challenges and celebrations. Sing when you’re winning. But don’t pout when you‘re down and out.

”Don’t wish it away, Don’t look at it like it’s forever”

Elton John

One of my favourite songs is this Elton John classic. I’ve enjoyed it throughout my life. Those first two lines are so catchy and are appropriate at so many times. It can slap you awake and out of complacency. Those words remind me that life is short. You’ve got to, “live every second, without hesitation”.

You learn in the tough times. Don’t miss the lessons that are there for the taking.

Sometimes you have to live like there’s no tomorrow. Because one day there won’t be one.

Don’t wish it away.

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CategoriesGratitudeTime

Today Is A Brilliant Day!

If you have the ability, education, means and time to read this blog, you are doing well. In that case, today is a brilliant day!

Everyday is a fresh new day. It is full of possibility and hope. Sure there will be the issues you have to deal with, but those are usually temporary. They may feel heavy and annoying or unbearable at the time. However, time is a great healer and with time pain can fade, whether it is emotional or physical pain.

Today is the only thing we know we have for sure. As long as it is happening, we need to make the absolute best of it we can. If we feel sluggish, we need to kick ourselves in the pants. If we feel tired, we can run on the spot or do some press ups to get ourselves going again.

The sights, the smells, the sounds, the tastes, touches and feelings bring this magical world to life. Breathe it in and experience it anew and to the full every single day.

A powerful song from the 80’s, Up Where We Belong (Cocker and Warnes), had some fitting lyrics. “Who knows what tomorrow brings”. And also, ‘All we have, is here and now. All our life, out there to find’.

Enjoy every moment.

Today is a brilliant day!

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Looking Back At 80

How will you look back on your life? What will be in it? What will have been worth the price you paid? Looking back at 80 is an important exercise to do many times when you are younger.

Imagine you are 80 years old. Can you look back over the span of 80 years and be filled with joy and contentment? There are a lot of tough questions in there. You will have to face your expectations versus reality gap and hope there is positive gap (reality ended up better) rather than a negative one.

It raises some helpful thoughts that should be considered throughout our lives. You might ask yourself the following questions. Am I living a good life? Should I spend more time and energy on family, career, finances, mental health, physical fitness or my community? How can I do more for others or myself? What will I accept or be happy with?

Its going to be harder to achieve anything once you reach your 80’s. There are many that keep going like Warren Buffett. However, you’ll have to have good genes, stay healthy and have a little luck on your side.

You may wish you had worked harder, studied more, saved more money or maintained better fitness. There is still time to change the outcome but you’ll have to put the effort in.

Looking back at 80 should be a delightful experience.

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CategoriesActionTime

The Best Time Is Now

If it is important, do it now. Make the phone call. Write the letter. Speak with your spouse. Attend your child’s play. The best time is now because we do not know if we will ever have another opportunity like this.

From my experience, you never really get a second chance at the same thing. If you are uncertain, you can pause, reflect or gather additional information. However, if you feel it in you that you should be doing something, do not wait.

S/He who hesitates is lost. The origin of this truism is often traced back to the Joseph Addison play Cato from 1712. I used to think it only meant that you lose if you hesitate. For example, when the goal is near and you have the ball ready but you don’t take the shot. In that case you might lose the match or simply lose that opportunity.

As I reflect on it more though, I see it could also refer to losing confidence due to doubt. If you were thinking of calling someone to go on a date and you hesitate, doubt will begin to creep in. You might lose confidence and push back the phone call even further. You may become lost in your thoughts, mind, doubts and uncertainty.

Life is short. Act fast.

The best time is now.

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CategoriesObserveTime

It Depends

You’re unlikely to ever know the optimal route ahead. Just as you are unlikely to ever discover how your ’what if’ moments would have turned out. It depends on millions of actions, reactions and further ripples in your life and others.

Your tastes, perspectives and priorities can change. Whether it is due to time, age, company, awareness or some other matter, how you perceive things can adjust. This can be only slightly or a complete 180 degrees. Some people even do a 360 degree change. Just ask anyone who has divorced someone only to remarry them again later.

Life is such an exact and detailed process. Changing one tiny little thing, on a long trajectory, can land you in such a different place. This idea has been explored in so many different ways. One that springs to mind, as I am in London, is the movie Sliding Doors.

Often people will reflect back on their What If moment and decide everything would be the same, except that one thing better. Rarely do people think they would have died, been poorer, or been in any other less well off situation.

This type of thinking can easily lead back to the expectation versus reality gap. By exaggerating the heightened expectation against an unchangeable reality, you are likely to feel a slight depression. So don’t do that. We won’t ever know, because it depends.

Assume life would have been worse in any other scenario. If you want change, start now, not in the past.

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CategoriesGratitudeThink About ItTime

Has Life Become Too Easy?

The Mayflower took 66 days to cross the Atlantic Ocean in the autumn of 1620. Concorde took only 2 hours and 52 minutes to cross. Has life become too easy?

On the Mayflower there were about 30 crew and 102 passengers. You could fit about the same number of people on Concorde.

The ship was challenged by rough seas and difficult winds. The passengers spent most of those two months seated and seasick. One person was washed overboard. Hard to imagine what the dining service was like.

Meanwhile, the Mach 2 turbojet-powered supersonic passenger airliner had seatbelts, champagne and a very good reputation.

Also, in the Mayflower era, it took about 3 months to get a message to a transatlantic loved one. Today, you can simply FaceTime, Zoom or Skype them. With these video calling options, people can actually speak to, see and hear their dear friends and family in real time. Amazing!

There is so much efficiency and so little effort required today. This may be getting our expectations way ahead of our realty. This creates the ER Gap. This can be quite a dangerous place. It can even bring with it various mental health challenges.

Has life become too easy? Perhaps for many it has.

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CategoriesActionTime

Plan Your Day Out

Distractions are your challenge. They may be from friends, work colleagues, children, illness, phone calls, post etc. Plan your day out. Allow some contingency time for distractions. Though it is best to limit your distractions to as few as possible. None is even better.

Take a piece of paper and write out your day. From the minute you intend to wake up until the minute you intend to go to sleep. Write it out in 15 minute intervals. Unless one activity is going to take up a longer period of time. Then write that amount of time. For example:

06:00 – 06:15 Wake up. 6 Minute miracle morning. Change for run.

06:15 – 06:30 Stretch. Loo break. Put on trainers, headphones and prepare apps.

06:30 – 07:00 Run. Listen to X podcast/audiobook/YouTube channel

Allow for ten minute breaks. Sometimes these will be used to relax. Other times they will act as catch up zones. These help get you back on track when a distraction has put you behind by five or 10 minutes.

Allow for one full hour in your day for unforeseen events. These could be phone calls you have to take from a child, parent, boss, tax inspector or a person dropping by your desk or home.

Plan your day out before you go to bed. Track how close your plan is to reality. It’s fascinating.

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CategoriesActionTime

Spending Time Wisely

It’s fascinating to watch ourselves try to save money but spend precious moments doing it. Spending time wisely is almost an art form and partly a science. Using our time on positive and useful things is much more beneficial to us than squandering it.

It is an interesting balance with time. As we do not know how much of it we will have, we want to make good and efficient use of it. In addition, we do not know how well we will be physically and/or mentally through our lifetime, even if it is a long one.

So there are trade offs. You have choices and decisions to make. And these choices are frequently adjusting to new realities. Therefore your decisions may change.

When you are young, or much older, most people have more time than money. Therefore they will wait in a 10 minute queue or walk 20 minutes to save a pound or two. As a person acquires more money they are more likely to spend it to save time, rather than spend time to save money.

You can earn more money in life but there is little you can do to extend your natural time on earth.

In addition, feed your mind with positive, hopeful, helpful and wonderful things. Spending time wisely also means making little room for complaint, anger, negative and frustrating information or entertainment. The cost is too high.

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CategoriesObserveThink About ItTime

A Time And A Place

Everything belongs somewhere at some time. You might think of the Spacetime continuum when you read this. Having a time and place is natural. Though not everything will exist in the time and place of your preference.

At one moment a bowl will exist in your cupboard. Then it will be moved to the table for cereal or soup. It may then find itself in the dishwasher before being returned to the cupboard.

It may be your favourite bowl. However, someone in your house may have used it. So perhaps it wasn’t where you wanted it to be when you wanted it there. Let’s say it was dirty and in the dishwasher when you wanted to use it.

This is the way life is. Everything has a time and a place. But it may not be according to your desires. Besides, there seems to be too many places on Earth and in the universe for you to dictate where every single item should be and when.

So at those moments you find yourself trying to control too much with your Jedi capabilities, it’s time to let it go. Where focus goes, energy flows, as Tony Robbins says.

So put things in the best place you can at this time. Accept things are in the best place, if you can’t change them. And focus on the exact changes you wish to make.

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CategoriesGratitudeThink About ItTime

I Like Hanging Out With People Like Me

It always depends on the moment and what I am interested in at the time. However, I like hanging out with people like me. It seems like a natural feeling.

When I listen to rock music, it’s more fun if I am with people who enjoy the same bands. It’s less fun if the people with me don’t enjoy the bands or music genre. And certainly it is not very enjoyable if they simply criticise it or complain about it.

When I go running, I prefer to go with people like me. I prefer to go with people who like running. And ideally they are ready to go in the early morning which is what I prefer. Additionally, it is better going with someone who runs a similar distance and pace too. Though I’m happy to be pushed to go further and faster.

Whether it’s food, sport, holidays or almost anything I can think of, I like hanging out with people like me.

And those people are oftentimes different people for each thing. This is great because they can bring other aspects into the mix too.

It’s great to get different perspectives. But when I want to enjoy myself, I like hanging out with people like me.

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