CategoriesObserve

The Dichotomy Of Life

You have to be impatient at times and patient at others. The dichotomy of life recognises that an extreme action, or its opposite, may be required depending on the situation.

If your daughter has had an accident, you should be impatient in getting her to medical help. However, 99% of the time, you should be patient when going through traffic.

Do you ever find yourself out of time? Yet, at other times, you have too much time on your hands? (Cue the 1981 song by Styx here)

You have songs espousing to Keep The Faith (Bon Jovi) and groups called Faith No More.

There is a delicate balancing act between the extremes most of the time. It isn’t always there, but it is usually a good thing. Go and find examples of this in your life. Although, they may not come quickly to you, if you put in the effort, and have patience, you’ll see them.

You will find many articles written on this topic. Have a read and see what you think. Do not think you are alone in your thoughts. At any given moment, other people have the same thought as you.

The dichotomy of life is real.

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CategoriesActionHealth & FitnessReframe your thoughts

Get Your Frustrations Out

Frustrations, disappointments and missed expectations can lead to a negative energy inside. You need to get your frustrations out somehow.

Different people do it in different ways at different times in their lives. Some people like to box, some prefer gardening but even a simple walk can help. Others fancy meditation while I enjoy a good, long run.

Something physical is best. It helps to get that negative energy out. It can also tire you out, which can be quite useful too. Getting a good night’s sleep can be difficult with negative energy and things on your mind. So expelling that energy and getting tired can greatly help you to get the sleep you should have.

In addition, you will often wake up with a better perspective in the morning. A fresh, new day often brings with it a greater sense of the possible.

If you don’t do something physical, it is possible you will build up the negative energy in your body. This can manifest into aches, pains, discomfort and other ailments including headaches.

Meditation or similar mind exercises can also be quite helpful. Together with exercise, good sleep, plenty of water and a positive attitude, and life should be very good.

Get your frustrations out in a positive, harmless way. It’s healthy!

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CategoriesActionProgressReframe your thoughts

Study Hack

There are shortcuts in life. Many shortcuts are legal and moral. However, you do need to be aware of them. Today I’ll explore a life study hack.

If you are trying to gain knowledge on a topic, you need to study it. I’ve found it does not matter whether you are studying business, entertainment, travel, a language, a sport or any other topic. The actual act of studying it is critical.

In addition, if you really want to excel in this subject, you are best to immerse yourself in it. Study the latest books on it as well as the classics. Watch movies and videos on the subject, listen to podcasts and get involved doing it yourself.

However, one of the best shortcuts to knowledge is having an interactive conversation with someone who already knows the subject inside out.

A single conversation across the table with a wise man is worth a month’s study of books.

Chinese Proverb

The amazing thing about speaking to someone knowledgeable is their immediacy of feedback. They can understand your relative position and the question you have. Then they can provide specific advice for you in your situation.

This method can save you hours, weeks or even months of independent, linear study. Having someone jump in with relevant insight and guidance can be priceless.

That’s a study hack to try out.

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CategoriesObserveThink About It

Powerful Storms

Hurricanes, tornadoes, thunderstorms, lightning, torrential rain and high velocity wind are all associated with powerful storms.

These environmental systems can come into our lives quite quickly. They are often incredible to witness. The sites, sounds, size and impact of intense weather systems can leave one in amazement. Pictures and videos can capture the moment but being there live, in person, can provide a whole new perspective.

I mention this as, here in London, on the 18th May, we had some crazy weather. It swooped in rather quickly. The sky blackened. Possibly the longest rumbling thunder I’ve ever heard, enveloped us in a percussionists dream. There was sharp lightning, intense rainfall and even hail. Not one to be out in. Alas, both our sons arrived home in the middle of it and were absolutely soaked.

This reminds me of living through Hurricane Emily, the Category 5 storm that pummelled Mexico in 2005. In addition, I’ve witnessed some incredible storms in Eastern and South Western Ontario. Once, in the former, we had to pull over and stop the car because the rain was so torrential. In the later, the skies lit up with an incredible array of lightning.

Well sometimes we have storms in our life. Some we see coming and some explode upon us with little warning. But we can weather those storms. Know that it won’t last. It may be intense but it will subside and you can carry on again.

Powerful storms are engaging, but do end.

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CategoriesActionHealth & FitnessReframe your thoughtsWeightWeight loss

Losing Weight

As we exit lockdown, I hear people talking about the weight they gained, which they now would like to lose. However, losing weight needs a rebrand.

It is a common phrase and quick to the tongue. The trouble I find is the use of the word reflecting loss. Losing and loss are usually associated with sad or frustrating things.

There are only a few times where losing someone or something is a good thing. The two that come to mind are when someone is chasing you and when trying to have greater fitness.

Most of the time, loss is not good. We are rarely happy saying things like I lost the race, the match or the series. Nor do we enjoy losing our keys, health, friends, jobs or minds (though we may not notice the last one so much).

Our minds also work overtime to resolve the loss. So even if you lose weight, your mind sets off to find it again. This is rarely ideal if you’ve been making the effort to be slimmer or more fit.

So while we wait for the world to stop combining those two words, try using others. Perhaps, “I am getting to my best weight” or ”my ideal size“. “I am getting fitter every day.”

Stop losing weight and start finding your ideal you.

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CategoriesActionGratitudeReframe your thoughtsTime

Undoing History

The desire to undo things done must be as old as civilisation itself. People say and do things they wish they could take back. Undoing history would be lovely in some respects. However, there is no giant red rewind button to facilitate this.

Wouldn’t it be nice if such and such had happened or hadn’t happened. The musings of those not wanting to accept the brutal facts of reality. Things are as they are today. They are like this precisely because billions of people did trillions of things and they can’t all be undone.

By constantly living in the hope of the past being different, we can drive ourself to madness.

It may give us some comfort to hope that we will be young again. Or even that wars will not have been fought and past transgressions never occurred. Spending time on trying to right the past uses up energy we could use to improve the present and the future.

Sure it would be better if certain things were a certain way today. Anyone whose family has had a difficult past would probably agree. However, it has happened a certain way and we must make the best of it now.

Rewriting history might make you feel better about the story but the results are in.

Undoing history is still not possible. Best to focus on what is.

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CategoriesObserveReframe your thoughts

Who Is Famous To You?

This test will help you to understand what is important in your life. You can more easily see where you are headed. Who is famous to you? Why do you know them? Why do they matter to you?

If you can name most of the players in English rugby, then you have a rugby focus. Some people will know all the names of the Prime Minister’s cabinet. That will tell you something about them.

If you know all the names of the journalists at a certain newspaper, it may indicate where you get your news from.

Now, just because these people are famous in your eyes, does not mean that other people will know them or even should know them. Other people will follow a different group and not know a thing about those that you follow.

What is important here is that where you spend time and energy, is the direction you are moving. So if the people you follow are in country music, you will move toward that culture. If it is mafia bosses that you follow, you might find your life being absorbed by organised crime.

Be aware of all the influences on your life. Then assess whether that is truly an important direction to be moving in. And also why it is so important in the context of your 90 year life.

Who is famous to you?

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CategoriesGratitudeObserveReframe your thoughts

The Work Of Others

Look around you. Everything in your home, office or neighbourhood was the thought or effort of someone else. The work of others surrounds us.

Look around your living room. Perhaps you have a sofa, rug, fireplace, TV, chair, ceiling, light fixture and many other things. You may see several books, pictures in frames, tissue boxes or potted plants. All of these things were thought up by one person or a group of people. Then some people did the manufacturing of it.

It is amazing. All of those people you never met, but whose creative handiwork surrounds you. Then there are the things you can’t really see like electrical wires, plumbing and WiFi.

Out in the streets you have roads, sidewalks, pavement, cars, trucks, sewers, bridges, trains, traffic lights, buildings and buses. People imagined life with these things and there they are! Isn’t it a wonder? It is amazing beyond belief.

Someone conceived the idea. Another person organised it into existence. And you get the benefit of it. Things were dug out of the ground for you. Or they were chopped down. Either way, they are in your world and you get the benefit of their beauty or utility.

Be grateful and appreciate the miracle and wonder that is our modern world.

The work of others is mostly a blessing. Treat it that way.

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CategoriesGoals, Results & New ThinkingReframe your thoughtsThink About It

Expect To Win!

You need to begin with the end in mind. And the end result you should be aiming for is a winning one. Expect to win! You’ll feel better for it.

Life is a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you expect something to happen, it is more likely to. If you don’t expect it, it’s quite possible it won’t.

Part of the expectation is to see yourself in that final moment. If you can visualise yourself as successful or victorious, you will have won half the battle. You will feel more capable and confident. The sense of achievement will run through you. You may even straighten up a little and walk taller. Perhaps you will speak with more authority and determination.

Certainly the taste of the win will help to motivate you. In addition, you can run the plan backwards to see what you need to do to reach that moment. Then you can work harder, train harder, prepare better and feel like it is going toward something useful.

Seeing the result can be quite motivating. Think about it often and play with the finer details of the moment in your mind. The more real you can make it, the more real it should become.

The opposite is also true though, so guard those thoughts closely.

Expect to win!

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CategoriesGratitudeReframe your thoughtsThink About It

A Few Minutes With Andy Rooney

Who had an impact on your life? What do you remember of them? I fondly recall watching, “A few minutes with Andy Rooney” every week on TV.

From the age of eight until probably 14, I looked forward to those three minutes with Andy every Sunday night. My parents would watch 60 minutes and I quite enjoyed it too. But the bit I relished the most was that time with Andy.

He was grandfatherly and spoke his mind. A lot of it made sense to me. He was easy to understand. Occasionally he would come on and correct himself or apologise for something he said the previous week. I liked him more for having considered it and then mentioning the point.

He spoke from his perspective, as all of us do. It’s a little difficult to speak from someone else’s perspective. And as such, you can only say it one way. Odds are very high though, that other people listening will have a different perspective. That’s ok. If they politely note that difference, it can be mentioned. Although, you don’t have to reference or note all the different perspectives that you didn’t have or became aware of after.

Andy’s whimsical commentary of everyday life, amongst other things, intrigued me. I liked his delivery. He made people reflect and think a little. I enjoyed that.

A few minutes with Andy Rooney will always have a home in my heart and my mind.

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