Scott, Author at Scott's Thinking

Decoding Communications

Posted on September 30, 2020

Engaging with someone can be tricky business. There is a lot of room for error and misunderstanding. Decoding communications can be helpful but you need to be aware of the pitfalls.

Have you ever thought, “There is no way they can disagree with this point”. And then the other persons finds a way. Why is that? What happened between your very clear and concise thought and their response to it?

First there is your intent. That is reflected in how you say something. Are you being bossy, suggestive, argumentative or condescending?

Then there are also the words you use and the order you use them. Words can mean different things to different people at different times. For example, we often get a giggle at our house when referring to pants. For the Canadian parents, pants are trousers. Whereas the British children more commonly know pants as underwear. But there are other words which can elicit quite strong emotional responses.

There is also the element of who is saying it. “You are chatting again”, might have a very different impact on a couple of teenagers if it comes from their teacher. But if it is said by a friend at lunch time, it might come across with more humour.

Decoding communications can be challenging. These are just some of the issues you can encounter.

Action Health & Fitness Weight Weight loss

Get Tidy And Organised

Posted on September 29, 2020

Do you have piles of papers, books or things piling up anywhere? Or are you obsessively neat? Get tidy and organised and you might notice a new sense of confidence, pride and relaxation.

One of the key aspects to life is setting up your environment to win. If you want to lose weight, place your walking gear at the end of the bed so its easy to just go in the morning. And stop buying the crisps, chocolate and ice cream. If it is not in the house, you can’t eat it.

So it stands to reason that if you want to be more relaxed, make your space more relaxing. One way to do this is to remove all things that might make relaxing even slightly less easy. Tidy up books and papers. Donate books and place papers where they belong. What else is on show that needs to go?

Tidying up can be cathartic. You gain a sense of control. In addition you may feel a greater pride of place. One other benefit is being able to find things quickly.

Getting things organised is the start. And it can take a little while to get there. In the meantime though, train yourself to put things in their place immediately. Don’t simply ‘set things down for a minute’.

Get tidy and organised. You’ll love it.

Progress Think About It

Value Judgements And Tradeoffs

Posted on September 28, 2020

Making decisions is easier when you know what you value. We are constantly assessing and prioritising our value judgements and tradeoffs.

Imagine you’re going to the shop with a £5 note. You intend to buy milk, bread and cereal. However, on your way, you walk past a newsstand with the latest edition of your favourite magazine.

Now you need to decide if the food is more important or the magazine. Alternatively you could return home for more cash to consume it all. But that would require more time at this moment. So now you need to create a hierarchy of values.

Do you value your time more now (perhaps you’re in a rush to a meeting)? Perhaps the magazine articles will help you understand a critical subject for a work project. Or maybe your child has been ill and not eaten for three days. Though now they want their favourite cereal and bread.

What item will be most important to you and your life in this very instant? The decisions and tradeoffs need to be made now.

Your views and circumstances may change in six months or six years. Nonetheless, you need to make this decision right here and now.

We are constantly making momentary value judgements and tradeoffs. Remember though, so is everyone else.

Reframe your thoughts Uncategorized

It’s Easier Than You Think

Posted on September 27, 2020

Everything is. If you do some research, use a model, develop a plan and follow it, you will be fine. It’s easier than you think, so don’t think too much. Just go do it.

However, sometimes things get a little difficult, challenging or hostile. Simply focus through that. Remain resilient. With a longer term vision, you know you’ll get there.

It’s certainly not impossible. Although some things are less likely. But if you are determined, disciplined and dynamic, you will press on and succeed. Few things are rocket science. Even rocket science isn’t what it used to be.

Think about that. 1903 was the first successful flight by the Wright Brothers. In less than 60 years (1961), President Kennedy announced the goal of landing a man on the moon that decade. A further 60 years on and we have several groups targeting a crewed Mars mission by the mid 2020’s.

That’s amazing! In just over 100 years humans have gone from can’t fly, to flying, to potential inter-planetary space travel. People are learning and applying at a phenomenal rate.

If we as a species can do that, imagine what you as an individual can do. Fortunately, there is a process for everything. And, if you follow the learn, plan, do and repeat model, you can, with some patience, achieve anything.

It’s easier than you think!

Action Progress Think About It

How High Can You Reach?

Posted on September 26, 2020

Some people love to strive. You can see this in many children. Just place the honey on a higher shelf. It’s like saying, “How high can you reach?”. Then watch that child stretch, climb, extend and exert themselves until it is safely in their grasp.

The honey is part of their vision for a better life. They know that the sweet taste and sugar high is just beyond their here and now. Many children carry on with that zest to follow a better vision. This is often in exchange for a little adventure, struggle or sacrifice.

Just like when a child is climbing and reaching, sometimes the outcome isn’t ideal. They may slip. Or they could fall. Sometimes they may reach their goal only to have it slip from their fingers. In their worst case scenario, the glass jar slips from their outstretched hand and breaks into a gooey mess on the floor.

Children learn to carry on and try again. Often they recall the lessons but not the pain of any previous failed attempts. Selective memory can be helpful.

Find a vision that excites you enough to stretch for it. Choose something that will fill you with joy and delight on the path, not just at the destination.

How high can you reach?

Reframe your thoughts Think About It

You Can’t Handle The Truth

Posted on September 25, 2020

Or can you? Are you willing to entertain facts that make you uncomfortable? Perhaps you can’t handle the truth when you’ve already created your desired reality. Some people can adjust the story when new facts come to light. Others cannot.

We know we make initial decisions based on emotion. Most people then search for facts or information, or even simply an opinion, to confirm we are justified in our thinking.

That’s one way to drift through the world. Someone did say ignorance is bliss. A friend once noted that you shouldn’t let the truth get in the way of a good story.

Be careful if you find yourself biased, blissfully ignorant and enjoying the story too much. It may not be comfortable, but you really should go find the people who are saying the opposite and understand what facts they are looking at. Then use your own mind to assess ALL the relevant data and come to a conclusion.

You don’t have to let people feed you their stories. Their agenda in influencing you to a certain way of thinking may not be the best thing for you. Some people are delighted if you are being gullible. You may be a servant to their special interest.

Perhaps you can’t handle the truth. Demand to know your truth. Like in that powerful scene from A Few Good Men.

Health & Fitness

The Case For Laughter

Posted on September 24, 2020

Few things compare with having a really good laugh. What a fabulous feeling it gives you. The case for laughter is easy: It makes you feel great.

I’ve been searching out more laughter in the past week. I’ve seen a few video clips that have really made me chuckle. There have even been a couple where I was caught off guard and really howled. Those can be the best moments. When you really weren’t expecting something to be funny and it strikes you in a certain way.

YouTube is a particularly good way to discover great clips. You can search for particular shows, comedians, situations or types of humour. Then their algorithm gives you more of the same. You don’t have to do much work to find a stream of clips that suit you and the mood you’re in.

I’m a fan of clever comedy. Quick wit or a facial expression can be brilliant. Though I generally don’t enjoy put downs, practical jokes or physical pain as comedy. It’s simply not my thing.

Laughter is the best medicine. You smile and your body releases endorphins. These are your body’s good feeling chemicals. They can reduce pain and help you heal.

This is the case for laughter.

Now go find some good clean funny videos and make your face ache with joy.

Action Reframe your thoughts

We Choose The Meaning

Posted on September 23, 2020

Lots of things happen in our lives. Words are spoken and actions are taken. Regardless of what happens though, we choose the meaning of the words or actions. This is true whether we say the words or do the actions or whether someone else does.

These interpretations, judgements, reactions and decisions shape our present and our future. We can even make things align a certain way to create a new history.

I recall being frustrated by people in their car not letting me go in front of them when merging with traffic. I would assign a number of reasons why they wouldn’t let me in. Usually it was because they weren’t being very nice.

Then, one time, I was focused on the outer lane. By the time I saw the person wanting to come into my lane, it was too late to let them do it safely. I realised I was ‘that’ person. Another time I was in a hurry, and didn’t want to be slowed down, so didn’t let them in.

So, by having the experience myself, I realised that sometimes there are valid reasons that people do things. In addition, I thought that I should give people the benefit of the doubt. Especially as I believe people are generally good.

We choose the meaning of things so why not make it positive.

Action Observe

Keep Your Eyes On The Prize

Posted on September 22, 2020

It seems so simple. Yet, this one thing will often determine first place from everyone else. Keep your eyes on the prize is a popular saying in some circles. If you’ve not heard it before, maybe you should look for higher performance circles!

The prize could be considered your ’why’. For example, how you will feel after winning. Or it could simply be that which you attain with success. This could be money, medals or merit.

Whatever the prize is, you need to keep your eyes on it. You need to remain focused on what you need to do all day, every day. Eliminate distractions. Stay disciplined. Keep positive and high energy. You will need to be tough and resilient so you can bounce back from setbacks.

The prize will motivate you. It will also help you push through the challenges of training. Both your mental grit and physical fitness will be tested repeatedly. You need to build the toughest you possible. This way you will be able to push through the most challenging moments and still emerge victorious.

If you want the outcome bad enough, you will push through and succeed.

The critical key is to keep your eyes on the prize.

Observe Think About It

Few Things Are Straightforward

Posted on September 21, 2020

We make snap decisions all the time. There is little time to gather all the facts and then weigh them. Few things are straightforward and yet we often take an immediate view.

Why is that?

Survival instinct would be one reason. Emotional reactions, which are instinctive and learned, is another. They are also much quicker to use to come to a conclusion than any other method.

Bias is another issue. Sometimes we want an outcome to be true so badly that we will ignore strong evidence to the contrary.

Sometimes, some people, take the time to investigate both sides of the story. Of course there is nuance and uncertainty. And certain situations come down to one key element. Those that can recognise their own bias and still make a fair decision are highly regarded.

Judges, referees and umpires all make a career out of remaining objective. We rely on them to interpret the rules and the laws as set out. Both the spirit and the letter of the law can be considered. They gather the key information, weigh it, understand what they want and what is best for the situation.

Few things are straightforward. Learn to take time, gather facts from both sides, remove your bias and then present a calm conclusion. Everyone will benefit from this process.