Reframe your thoughts Archives - Page 92 of 103

You Can’t Handle The Truth

Posted on September 25, 2020

Or can you? Are you willing to entertain facts that make you uncomfortable? Perhaps you can’t handle the truth when you’ve already created your desired reality. Some people can adjust the story when new facts come to light. Others cannot.

We know we make initial decisions based on emotion. Most people then search for facts or information, or even simply an opinion, to confirm we are justified in our thinking.

That’s one way to drift through the world. Someone did say ignorance is bliss. A friend once noted that you shouldn’t let the truth get in the way of a good story.

Be careful if you find yourself biased, blissfully ignorant and enjoying the story too much. It may not be comfortable, but you really should go find the people who are saying the opposite and understand what facts they are looking at. Then use your own mind to assess ALL the relevant data and come to a conclusion.

You don’t have to let people feed you their stories. Their agenda in influencing you to a certain way of thinking may not be the best thing for you. Some people are delighted if you are being gullible. You may be a servant to their special interest.

Perhaps you can’t handle the truth. Demand to know your truth. Like in that powerful scene from A Few Good Men.

Action Reframe your thoughts

We Choose The Meaning

Posted on September 23, 2020

Lots of things happen in our lives. Words are spoken and actions are taken. Regardless of what happens though, we choose the meaning of the words or actions. This is true whether we say the words or do the actions or whether someone else does.

These interpretations, judgements, reactions and decisions shape our present and our future. We can even make things align a certain way to create a new history.

I recall being frustrated by people in their car not letting me go in front of them when merging with traffic. I would assign a number of reasons why they wouldn’t let me in. Usually it was because they weren’t being very nice.

Then, one time, I was focused on the outer lane. By the time I saw the person wanting to come into my lane, it was too late to let them do it safely. I realised I was ‘that’ person. Another time I was in a hurry, and didn’t want to be slowed down, so didn’t let them in.

So, by having the experience myself, I realised that sometimes there are valid reasons that people do things. In addition, I thought that I should give people the benefit of the doubt. Especially as I believe people are generally good.

We choose the meaning of things so why not make it positive.

Action Progress Reframe your thoughts Time

Today Is The Day!

Posted on September 20, 2020

That’s right. It doesn’t even matter when you are reading this. Right now you can shift your life onto a new path. Today is the day!

Just saying that phrase can get the excitement levels up. You may also have to contend with some new level of anxiousness. But that is ok. This feeling can be channelled in a positive way. Your body is tingling. Some call it butterflies.

Regardless of what it is, it is more important how you perceive this feeling. And also what you will then do with it. You may simply be excited about getting extra energy into the day and making significant progress.

However, it may also be that you are expanding your comfort zone. This is great news. And of course it will feel a little uncertain or uncomfortable. But don’t focus on that. Or it could grow and get out of control.

Instead, focus that extra adrenaline and energy towards the desired outcome you’re seeking. This is a key step in shifting from uncomfortable to unstoppable. Harness this energy and use it to drive forward toward your desired result. This tactic will bring you one step closer to your goal.

If you do this repeatedly, you will achieve anything.

It is time to start.

Today is the day!

Action Progress Reframe your thoughts

To Compete Or Not Compete

Posted on September 18, 2020

That is the question. There is a fine line between being overly relaxed and taking things too seriously. To compete or not compete can be a very challenging question.

Whether it is at the country level, national, regional or local, this is not really a question. You train to win. However, before you get on that road, there is a period of life where winning isn’t everything. At least not to everyone.

As an individual, playing at park, school or local club level, there can be an element of playing too hard. Some children are there just to have some fun. Other children are only there because their parents are encouraging them to be there. Occasionally one child doesn’t want to be there at all.

However, to make it to progressively higher levels, one needs to challenge. So it stands to reason that if you want to play at the those levels, you may need to play harder at the younger age groups. However, some children may play too hard when the stakes are not very high.

This is not necessarily good or bad. It is simply something that people have to get through. Children and parents all have to be flexible enough to allow for both ends of the spectrum.

To compete or not compete. Simply keep getting better and it will all work out.

Reframe your thoughts Think About It

The Words You Choose Define You

Posted on September 17, 2020

Listen to the words you use. Notice which words others select for their articles and speeches. The words you choose define you.

Remember that what you direct your mind to focus on, your brain will execute. Your mind will also absorb what it sees. Then you tend to become what has been absorbed. So be careful what you watch, read and listen to as it will affect your mood, anxiety and tension.

“Fear is the path to the dark side…fear leads to anger… anger leads to hate… hate leads to suffering.”
Yoda

Recall Anakin was a happy young boy. However Tusken Raiders captured his Mom and tortured her. His fears turned to anger and quickly to intense hate which did indeed lead to suffering. Immediate suffering for the entire Tusken Raider group and extensive long term mental suffering for Anakin.

He said he hated them and they were animals. Then he became what he said they were. His focus on hate led him to became an uncontrollable animal that brought more fear and suffering to more people.

The words you use choose define you. And those you hear, and the pictures you see, have an impact on who you become. If you find yourself feeling a little anxious, tense or moody these days, reduce your exposure to the information you are consuming. Or at least the sources it is coming from.

Action Health & Fitness Reframe your thoughts

Celebrate Life’s Special Moments

Posted on September 13, 2020

As you get a little older, or at least a little wiser, you realise how important each moment is. Celebrate life’s special moments as often as you can. They come and go so quickly.

My wonderful Mom turned 75 today. You wouldn’t know it. Full of energy and a positive, joyful attitude might make her seem younger than she is. She’s also fit and healthy, so that helps keep her youthful looking too.

Celebrating her birthday was great, despite it being in a Covid friendly, socially distanced way. It was lovely to join her in a conversation over Zoom to celebrate this milestone birthday. Technology is fabulous that way.

In preparing for this grand event, we were able to get some birthday videos sent to us from friends and family. A great little website called VidHug helped us out too. It is better than a card. You get a personalised memory delivered ’in person’. And the video will be easy to keep and find.

What struck me was so many people’s willingness to participate in fun, quirky and lovely ways. It was beautiful to hear their kind comments and the fond memories they had of Mom. It wanted me to make a bigger video with more people. She’s truly a unique and wonderful woman.

Celebrate life’s special moments whenever you can. Don’t wait. It will open your eyes to life’s beauty.

Action Gratitude Observe Reframe your thoughts

Catch People Doing Something Well

Posted on September 9, 2020

It’s so easy to criticise. Especially if you continue to practice doing it. Of greater benefit to one and all is to catch people doing something well.

I think I read about this in a parenting book many years ago. It really struck me. Although we want to guide our children and others well, it can mean we provide a disproportionate amount of negative feedback.

What builds confidence and leads to greater capability is hearing good and positive feedback. For most kids, they will do 99% of things in the good zone. Check whether you are giving 99% of your feedback on those good things they are doing.

This is the same with colleagues, other family members, the government, health care workers, police and teachers.

Every day, one hundred thousand things have to go right, at the right time. That’s just for things to go smoothly. If one thing isn’t right, try not to focus on that. Focus on all the other things going well.

There are various ways to address this. One is to recognise several of the good things that they have done, especially any they did particularly well. Often you can leave it there. A lot of times they already know what they could have done better.

Catch people doing something well and you’ll see more smiles.

Gratitude Reframe your thoughts Time

That Is A Lot Of Birthdays

Posted on September 8, 2020

Every once in a while, people we know celebrate their birthday. Today, roughly 21.4 million people will celebrate. That is a lot of birthdays!

The world population is now over 7.8 billion according to Worldometer. It really is hard to imagine that number of people. And they are all quite similar to you. They breathe, eat, use the loo, require sleep and have some income or way of sustaining themselves.

In addition, more than than 7.8 billion will celebrate a birthday in the next 12 months. The reason for this is that the world’s net population growth is currently about 81,000,000 each year.

So where could you host a big party for all of the people celebrating their birthday on the 8th September? Imagine the largest stadium you have ever been in. Was it an 18,000 seater arena? Maybe a 100,000 seater football stadium?

Let’s imagine the 100,000 seater stadium. There are only 11 of these in the world. Stadiums like Michigan, Tiger and Motera along with the Melbourne Cricket Ground. Camp Nou, Wembley and Twickenham are massive but don’t have a 100,000 seat capacity.

Picture how big those stadiums are. And all the people in them. Now picture 214 of those stadiums filled to capacity. That’s how many people would be celebrating their birthday on a given day.

That is a lot of birthdays!

Gratitude Reframe your thoughts

Life Is A Value Hierarchy

Posted on September 6, 2020

Throughout your life, you will need to choose between two or more options of value. Life is a value hierarchy and you are the constant decision maker.

A simple example of this is what to eat for breakfast. You may have the luxury of choosing between eggs royale or Cheerios. Some people will have more exciting choices and some far fewer. Some don’t have anything to choose from.

Whatever your situation, you then need to make a choice. First you make a choice of your preferred meal. Second, you make a choice about how you see your situation. What’s fascinating is how people perceive their situation.

Some will have all the best cooked, freshest food in the world and be happy. Others will find something to disparage. Those with poor, few or no choices, can find happiness or discontent too.

Extrapolate this out to all of the decisions you make in a day. You are constantly deciding what is more important and less important. Then you decide how you feel about it. Be careful though. Those decisions about how to feel about things, soon will become a habit.

You might not notice, but you may stop appreciating your moments of good fortune. Things may start to seem commonplace. You may become disenfranchised with imperfection.

Life is a value hierarchy. But you are at the controls.

Action Progress Reframe your thoughts Time Weight loss

Turn Up The Heat!

Posted on September 4, 2020

Ok, it’s been an unusual start to the year so far. Things may have been out of kilter or offline. However, now it is time to turn up the heat!

I mentioned the other day how it is time to accelerate to the finish. We don’t have a lot of time left to get the things done we want completed this year. So you need to start taking massive action. Lean into these final few months and make the most of them.

Turn up the heat! Get things moving today. Work an hour longer today. Wake up 30 minutes earlier tomorrow and go for that walk or jog you’ve been thinking about. I know you may be reading this on a Saturday morning. That does not mean chill out. That does not mean have a lie in. Double down on those weekend days.

Start a new habit now. Or as soon as you finish reading this. You will create a new bit of dynamism in your life. That will help you shift in other areas too. Work on your Art of Now! Do it, delegate it or dump it. The important piece though is to get moving now.

Act now! Turn up the heat!