Rather than tell people, sometimes it’s better to ask them. Let them be the person having to come up with a good answer. Often you’ll be surprised at how they rise to the occasion.
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Tag: People
People Overcompensate
If you’re driving, and you veer to the left, you may overcompensate and put yourself off the road, but on the right side.
When someone does something you think is wrong, you may go even further in trying to correct it.
Be mindful of this correction bias.
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Meet People
Get out there and meet people: Old friends, new connections, acquaintances, contacts, and friends you made a week ago. You never know what may come of it.
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The Stories People Create
“Obviously, she was thinking that….” How is it that we think we are so good at mind reading other people? Oftentimes people express what is on their mind and project it onto others.
Many people make a snap decision and then build a case around their view of the story. “He’s innocent!” And if he really is, then the police, prosecutor, witnesses etc are the real bad people.
They are often afraid to see what the reality could be, especially if they would be seen as taking the view of the other side compared to their usual orientation.
Think about this next time you create a story around something, or hear someone else do it. Where are the facts? Where did the story comes from? Are there elements that have probably been made up to fill in some space and make it more exciting or believable?
Stop yourself next time, especially if you’re making up negative points. Create lovely stories if you’re going to make stuff up.
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Keep People Updated
It takes a little more time but pays dividends. If you’re running behind schedule, let them know. If new relevant news is found, update the other parties.
Knowledge is power. Keeping it makes you more powerful. Sharing it makes everyone more powerful and effective.
More solutions are considered when more people have the information. A greater solution can appear from more minds working on the problem or with updated information.
Seek a better world for all, not just you or your desired few.
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Let People Know What You Are Looking For
Be open and honest and let people know what you would like. That saves them from trying to guess. The more specific you can be, the more likely someone will know whether they can help or not. And even if they say they can’t help you, that is still a win. At least you know they are off your list for this. That way you can focus on the other people who may be able to help you.
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Meet New People
If you have the chance, meet new people. Create scenarios where you meet new people now and then. New people can be the key to doors unknown.
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You Can’t Force People
Well, it is very hard to force people to do something against their will. At least, not without significant threat that is meaningful to them (not just a threat that you would respond to).
Ever try to get your children to do their homework against their will? How far do you have to take it? Do they do it on their own? Or with threat of detention at school? Perhaps you take away their phone for awhile or threaten to cancel desired play dates with friends.
What if they still won’t do it? Do you need to beg, plead and appeal to their sympathetic nature? Will bribes of candy, money, activities or other future benefits come into the frame?
This is the same for adults. If people don’t want to do something on their own, they will resist it in countless ways. Then, if you go the route of force, not friendliness, you may resort to imposing actions which could result in financial ruin, jail time, family distress, mental terror or even death.
You attract more flies with honey than vinegar. It’s an odd phrase but there seems to be sense behind it. #bekind
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People Are The Key
Have you ever walked into an empty building? Perhaps your office building on the weekend or school during summer holidays. People are the key. Otherwise those quiet, soulless locations just echo with memories past.
People create the buzz, the energy and the excitement. It is their being that breathes life into a situation or place. Although locations can conjure up strong memories, the strongest ones often involve people.
I recall walking into my secondary school, during the summer after graduation. My footsteps echoed in the halls. After 5 years there, it seemed like I would bump into someone. But there was nothing. Just the ghostly quiet and silent cacophony of days gone by.
There was a deep sense of melancholy and a yearning for those days again. The friendships and silliness. The final and laughter. The challenges, struggles, wins and memories. Those halls are filled with people who will live in your mind forever. They are frozen in time. Slow motion. Black and white. Fast forward, Colour. Echo.
Best friends or sworn enemies, there was a place for everyone. And without anyone, there was just a building. Empty rooms and hallways. The place had seen tens of thousands of student faces over the years. But ours were the only ones that lived in our minds. friendships for a lifetime.
People are the key.
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Lift People Up
It is so easy to be dismissive of people with a different viewpoint or life circumstance. Initial reactions can be harsh. But lift people up and you can help to make the world a better place
If you are a level 10 person in your field, you may find it frustrating that a level 2 person is giving inferior advice. This could be especially true if they were giving the advice to a level 1 person. We might even think there is an injustice that the level 1 person is getting inferior information.
However, from the level 1 person’s perspective, they may be delighted that they are getting any useful information at all. It may not be precise, perfect, expert level information, but at least it will help move them forward. As they get wiser, they will be able to seek out level 5, 7 and eventually level 10 advice.
Level 10 people might be frustrated with this natural evolution. Though, they could help the level 2 person improve their offer. Presumably all level 10 people were once level 2 people. So there should be some natural empathy there.
The world is imperfect. We can rail at its imperfections, or we can work together and bring others to the top of the mountain. The more we reach back and help those still coming up, the better society will be as a whole.
Lift people up.
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