Manners are free to exercise. They are simple to learn and understand. They are easy to practice. The cost of having them is small. The cost of not having them can be large.
Being well mannered is something in your control. Even if someone else has bad manners, you can still maintain your good ones.
Do the right thing. Have good manners.
Unfortunately we don’t usually notice our freedoms until they are taken away. If you grew up free, you don’t know anything else. That doesn’t make you bad, just unaware.
There are so many freedoms. Try appreciating your freedoms today.
Freedom of movement. Freedom of religion, to drive, to associate, go for a walk, make a living and use your money how you please.
Imagine each one of those being slowly taken away. Appreciate them now.
People are born and then develop their personalities. Billions, or trillions, of stimulus then have an impact on you and help to shape who you become. We begin to march, dance or drift towards our destiny as the characteristics become more pronounced or ingrained.
The sooner we can bombard people with good feedback and environments, the greater the chances there will be a bias for good. So notice the good in everyone. Remark upon it. Be sure to communicate it with intent to the person and those around them.
Not only will the person benefit from hearing great comments about themself, but you will benefit by looking for the good in people. With your radar seeking good, you are bound to find more good than anything else in the world. Those have got to be very good things for all concerned.
You can consider other perspectives. You can even prepare for things in advance. However, nothing can make you fully ready for exciting or challenging times. You can truly experience it only when it happens.
For example, a parent or grandparent dying is more impactful than you would think it would be. You know that in theory, we are all going to die. In addition, you’ve had years and sometimes decades to prepare for the moment. But when it happens, it can be quite a shock to the system.
Winning something special or seeing someone special after a long time can also be intense moment. You can guess how you would feel. But, living it is another level.
It’s good you can’t feel the extremes until those unique moments. It saves those very special or intense moments for only when it happens.
You can blame big oil companies if it makes you feel better. However, their products (oil, gas, plastics, etc) exist to quench people’s demand. They are not discovering, extracting, refining, shipping and storing oil and gas in the hopes that one day they will find a use for it and be able to sell it.
So governments and corporates can set the stage for change but it really comes down to the consumers of the world to make changes (forced or willingly) before we will see significant or meaningful change in environmental or climate impact.
With the world population expected to grow to just under 10 billion by 2050 there will be some additional strains on the environment. If countries haven’t been able to reach their Paris Accords targets previously, adding an additional 2 billion people in 30 years, a 25% increase, is unlikely to make the challenge easier.
So to reduce environmental impact, consumers will need to switch to new, clean energy sources in 2022. They / we will have reduce more, reuse more and recycle more if the world population has any chance of making a noticeable impact. To that end, what would you be willing to do? Give up on that new electric toothbrush and buy a bamboo one? Drive less? Stop air travel? Buy fewer clothes and plastic items? Only buy food from your country or local area? Reduce meat and dairy consumption to once per month?
I think most people find it incredibly difficult, or undesirable, to significantly shift their personal consumption habits whether it is to benefit climate change or not.
What would you give up to save the planet?
Choose your hard. It’s hard to start, continue, finish and fail. But if you don’t do the first three, you may have to settle for the last one.
Now we should get into the definition of fail, of course. It means different things to different people. Traditionally it means you did not succeed with your desired goal. Though it can be defined quite broadly. If you haven’t stopped trying then you may not have failed yet.
However, if there is a time limit, then if you’ve past the time allocated, you could say you failed. This is most accurate in a timed activity, project, match or game.
It’s not fun to think you failed at something. But you have only failed in the attempts up to now. Perhaps you will succeed on the next attempt!
Until then, it’s hard to fail. But it can be the only way to finally succeed.
Plan ahead for breaks. These can be 5 minute refreshers or two week vacations. Whatever length and style, you need to have them. And you need to enjoy them too!
When it’s downtime, relax. Unwind. Enjoy your downtime. Your mind, body and soul need it.
Give them an extra hug. Say some extra kind and supportive words. If they’re not near, hold them close in your heart. Your thoughts matter and your emotional support will be felt.
Write them a note. Give them a call. Arrange to visit them. These are important and powerful moments. You will feel it. They will feel it. It will be remembered and cherished.
Hold family and friends close.
Don’t go to bed angry. It will eat at you. You’re likely to get a bad night’s sleep. And what if by some weird quirk you never wake up? The other person’s last memory of you will be of an angry person. That might suit your angry feelings in this moment, but is it really how you want anyone to remember you?
As hard as it may be to swallow your pride, apologise and say a few kind words, it’s usually the better thing to do. It takes a lot of character and strength to be the first to start healing the wounds.
Life is short, so holding onto anger and resentment is not a great strategy. You’ll miss the joy and peace that could be yours. You could also help others find those faster.
Always make peace before bed. Your soul will thank you.
Yes, it’s not how you want things to be. However, it could be worse. Look at others around the world or even around your neighbourhood. There are probably several people that are having challenges in their life that you wouldn’t want. Many you wouldn’t even know about.
Just remember, things can get better with time and some effort. Nothing lasts forever, even cold November rain. (As GnR would put it).
I’m not saying your situation is easy or that I know anything about it. I am saying though that you should look at the positives, regardless of how insignificant they may seem. From that will grow strength and greatness. In time, wounds heal, thoughts improve, lives change.
What you think is or isn’t manageable or good, is simple a thought or perception. Perceive things differently. Flip those thoughts on their head. See the upside and be grateful for it.
It could be worse. Focus on those slivers of good.
